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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » LGBTQA Relationships » Places to be

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Author Topic: Places to be
Member # 31265

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So, I was wondering where in general were safe (and private) places to be with a partner of the same sex. Does anyone have any brilliant ideas?
(We are both in high school, and she is not out)

Posts: 19 | From: Here | Registered: Oct 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 28394

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It depends where you live, but in many cities there are a number of bars / restaurants which are queer friendly. Here, in the UK there's often a rainbow flag hanging outside queer friendly spaces.

It'd be a really good idea to find out about local Queer organisations, is there a GSA at your school? There are generally a queer networks in many cities/countries with regular meetings and who have information on where to go and to still feel safe.

Other than that, it'll unfortunately be up to you to decide whether or not you're safe. It's a good idea to look out for other same-sex couples and see where they go. Is your area generally hostile to homosexuality? Listen out for homophobic comments, which should also help out spotting places not to go.

Also, is it immediately obvious that you two are a couple? You needn't hide it, but if it's not immediately evident - ie if you don't really kiss in public - you may not have to worry about people's reactions if they don't even know.

You should be allowed to go where you want being who you want to be but your safety is even more important. If you do feel at risk or get threatened, it's generally important to report it to the management of wherever you are, or if it's really bad, the police.

[ 10-26-2008, 03:52 PM: Message edited by: PenguinBoy ]

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Posts: 633 | From: Bedfordshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 31265

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See, the deal is that we live in a generally very accepting community, but it is small enough that seeing people who know you is a regular occurrence and due to valid reasons, my girlfriend is unable to be out to our school community. We are also not old enough to go to bars (both in high school).
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Are you asking about just being out and about together, or are you asking about places to be sexual or physically affectionate?

I ask that because, honestly, there is so much heterosexism in the world that if you're just two girls out and about, most people are going to assume you're just friends. Often, that can be very irritating, but if you and she, or just she, want stealth, it's something you can use to your benefit.

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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