posted
I'm very girly and everyone who knows me thinks I'm totally straight. I am very attracted to guys, but once in a while I'll meet a girl that I'm just really attracted to. Often these girls are kind of (I hate using these term as I'm not one but I don't know what else to call it) butch, or at least appear so, and are not going to waste their time on straight girls. More than once I've befriended girls like this through work, mutual friends, etc. and shortly afterwards developed really strong crushes on them, and the situation can get jokingly flirty. The thing it that I'm often really attracted to these girls and receive strong signals that they are to me too, but some of them have made comments to me such as 'good thing you're straight' or they'd be 'really into you'. They just assume I'm a really playful person but am only interested in guys, and I don't know how to correct them without intensifying the situation too quickly.
Just like I wouldn't want to tell, say, a guy I liked who played guitar that I was 'into' guitar players - it would come off as cheesy. And often I'm not looking for sex or a deep relationship, I just want to hint to the girl that I'm not immune to her because of her gender.
Posts: 11 | From: North Dakota | Registered: Sep 2008
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That isn't a sexual invitation, nor is it cheesy: it's a plain statement of identity.
-------------------- Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen About Me • Get our book! Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Posts: 63420 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000
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posted
I have to back Heather up on this one - the only way anyone is going to know you aren't straight is if you tell them so.
Of course, if you're not entirely sure of your identity, or don't think it's anyone's business who you're attracted to, it's fine to keep it to yourself. Just realize that nobody will magically realize that you aren't straight!
Good luck! And don't forget you can always qualify what you say so nothing gets taken out of context.
Cheers, Winnie
Posts: 465 | From: Canberra, ACT, Australia | Registered: Jan 2001
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