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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » LGBTQA Relationships » Mo' Crushness

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Author Topic: Mo' Crushness
velocette
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Member # 3877

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And this is how it goes, and goes and goes...

I am a sophomore in high school who is comfortable with her attraction to both males and females.I have a good amount of senior friends who are gay and who also know about me. No problem there. Well, I have a crush on a girl in my grade... oh, no. She found out (I brought it upon myself, deep down I wanted her to know) and she says she's cool with it, which I tend to believe. I asked to talk with her at lunch today... but was too nervous to actually go up to her when the time came. She came up to me "Hey Hoodrat(our endearing term for eachother), let's talk" :

Her : So, yeah...
Me : I know you know
Her : Yeah. I can't return your feelings... but I'm cool with it. We can still be friends, you know?
Me : Yeah, OK. So... you're not like "that"?
Her : No.
Me : Are you sure?
Her ...(pause), I can't bring that to school. No, I can't bring that stuff to school.
:: unimportant babblings ::
Me : If you ever want to tell me anything... I'm here
Her : ... it's not like that


Ackers. I am confused by her. By the "I can't bring that to school" line, I have to believe that she's hiding something. I think that she is interested in girls, somewhat.

Now for the Scarleteen input that I desperately need :
1) Do you gather she may really be hiding something, or is it only my hoping?
2) Is there really any way to ask her again if she's straight without offending her?
3) What to do... what to do?


.veronica

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Posts: 81 | From: Hayward, California, USA | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
kythryne
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5460

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Y'know, without being in your friend's head, I really can't tell you what she's thinking. As for asking her again if she's straight, I'd suggest just hanging out with her (maybe not at school, but somewhere she'd be comfortable talking more openly) and see if she starts talking about it on her own. If there's something on her mind, she'll likely tell you.

Also, in this topic, I think Heather's comments were really interesting.

Kyth

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Kythryne Aisling
Scarleteen Advocate

"The only unnatural sexual act is that which you cannot perform."
-- Alfred Kinsey


Posts: 1685 | From: New York City | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Jill
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5375

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Unless she is willing to be open about her sexuality - at least to you - there really isn't much you can do at this point. She seems to have made it clear that, for whatever reason, a relationship of this nature is inappropriate for her at this time.

I really can't tell you whether or not she is hiding something, only she can do that. In any case it really doesn't matter; as I'm sure you know, sexuality is a personal thing and everyone deals with it in their own way.

I think you need to stick with just being her friend for now. She knows how you feel and she's fine with that; the best you can hope for is that she one day returns your feelings. Until then (because it may not happen) just enjoy your friendship and don't hesitate to try a new relationship.

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Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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