Donate Now
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » LGBTQA Relationships » Really...confused?

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Really...confused?
SweetBlood
Neophyte
Member # 49726

Icon 5 posted      Profile for SweetBlood     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I guess I never thought of falling in love with someone of my own gender until it happened at some point.

When it did. It left me not only heartbroken, but it left me with a HUGE number of questions that I can't answer myself, and no one else seems to know either. [Frown]

But the number one question, I have for myself is...

Does having sex with someone your own gender count as a first time? Or better yet...does not having been penetrated by a penis count? I don't know how that even works or if I was technically a virgin anymore after having had this relationship.

Posts: 9 | From: Unknown | Registered: Nov 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
May Day
Activist
Member # 39174

Icon 1 posted      Profile for May Day     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Hi SweetBlood,

I'm going to link you to a couple of posts on virginity. Virginity is NOT a scientific or biological fact, it is purely a social construct- which means that there can not be a One True Definition of it.
So, whether or not you consider yourself a virgin any more is entirely dependent on how your define virginity. And heck, if you disagree with any or all definitions of virginity, you can chuck the term out the window- it does not have to be a part of your sexuality if you don't want it to.

http://www.scarleteen.com/article/politics/magical_cups_bloody_brides_virginity_in_context

http://www.scarleteen.com/article/politics/20_questions_about_virginity_scarleteen_interviews_hanne_blank

If you want a bit of perspective, here's my personal decision on virginity and sex: I don't really find anything helpful in the concept of virginity, more important to me is to have meaningful (fun, safe and sexy) sexual experiences with people i care about and to learn from them.

Posts: 172 | From: Australia | Registered: Jul 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
SweetBlood
Neophyte
Member # 49726

Icon 1 posted      Profile for SweetBlood     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Whoops. Sorry for not looking at this earlier. But it REALLY helps with what you wrote.

Thank you!~

Posts: 9 | From: Unknown | Registered: Nov 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
This link is also particularly relevant: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/how_can_women_who_sleep_with_women_know_when_they_have_lost_their_virginity

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 67925 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3