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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » COMMUNITY ANNOUNCEMENTS & HELPS » Staff Stuff » Reminder: Pregnancy Scares

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Author Topic: Reminder: Pregnancy Scares
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Just really need to remind everyone that we are NOT a pregnancy scare support site.

We are here to provide sex, sexuality, sexual health and relationship information, education and support.

By all means, pregnancy (as well as pregnancy options, such as abortion, adoption and parenting), real risks of pregnancy, and help understanding what does and doesn't present those risks is part of what we do.

But, as you'll note from several other staff posts here and in the staff-only-answer forums, as well as in MANY replies, we are NOT a support site for pregnancy scares, particularly once we have already done our job of helping someone assess when there has NOT been a real risk -- where one answer truly needs suffice -- and advised next steps, such as pregnancy testing, physical or mental healthcare, and what they can do next time per making different choices so they either aren't taking risks they don't want to, or aren't doing things that don't pose real risks, but clearly still scare them, and they clearly don't feel able to manage.

We simply not only have the staff or resources for the sheer volume of these questions, this also simply is not what we do or our mission.

As every user has agreed to when registering for the boards, PLEASE go through information on the main site or the boards before even thinking about posting these: truly, no one's situation around these scares is so unique we haven't answered your question, or written content to cover it, at least once (and usually far more than once) before. If and when you do post about these, please respect limits we set with you, rather than trying to steamroll over them or manipulate around them.

And by all means, when we advise next steps, like seeking out healthcare for ongoing anxiety, getting out of relationships where you feel pressured for sex, stepping back from any sex that freaks you out, or seeing a GYN to follow up when you won't believe you're not pregnant, please either take those next steps or, as is your right, choose not to, but then understand that doesn't mean it's okay to keep bringing these same situations and freakouts back to us: it's just really not. Same goes double for bumping posts or making many posts because you are freaking out and want an answer RIGHT THIS VERY SECOND. We are not only not always here, we also have other users to serve besides those having pregnancy scares (and in all our services: remember, the board isn't our only direct service area), sometimes users in need of help where their crises are far more serious and pressing as well as far more in the arena of what we can actually help with.

More times than not, we just have to wait these freakouts out when they happen, take what information they give us to use to make different choices, or, when things are for real, wait until we get a period or can take a test, and then take steps from there. We can't make time move faster or somehow take that process away, and since so much of it involves learning things from these situations, as educators, it would be very counter to our job TO make that all go away, even if we had that power.

Just so you have them in one place, the following links may be useful to you:
• Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?
• Pregnancy Scared?
• Peeing on a Stick: All About Pregnancy Tests
• Where DID I Come From? A Refresher Course in Human Reproduction
• Risky Business: Learning to Consider Risk and Make Sound Sexual Choices
• Anxiety: Coping (from the Mayo Clinic)

Thank you.

[ 07-29-2013, 05:48 AM: Message edited by: Robin Lee ]

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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