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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » COMMUNITY ANNOUNCEMENTS & HELPS » Staff Stuff » Heather Away/Update

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Author Topic: Heather Away/Update
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Hey, all, just leaving a little update to keep you posted about what's been going on with me. You're all so transparent here when you're in a bad way, so it seems a bit strange not to be myself. Goodness knows we can all be in a bad way sometimes, and I'm certainly no exception.

The last few months have been really tough on me, with several kinds of pretty awful illness (and then my partner having some illness, too), a lot of financial hardship, a lot of things needing to happen for the site that have asked for a level of time, work and resources that have really stretched me to my limits. I've been really exhausted, and just really struggling. As things stood before last week, I was arranging to cut down my hours here out of necessity, simply because the number of hours I had been putting in were unsupported, and our budget is also such that -- as has been the case far more than once through the 15 years of the site -- I knew I'd need to take some time away to look for, and hopefully find, some extra paying work to support myself with. Wasn't too thrilled about that, either, for a host of reasons.

But then, at the start of last week, my partner and I came home from dinner to find my very beloved pug of 12 years dead, without any warning or illness beforehand. I've unfortunately walked in on a body and traumatic death before in my life, so something already awful is extra-triggering for me, plus, anyone who knows me knows that my dog and I were inseparable. Losing her, and like this, was really, really awful.

It turns out, we found out after we had the vet do a necropsy, that she had a very rare and always terminal brain illness around 1% of pugs can get which resulted in a seizure and then a stroke which killed her. It's not something anyone usually sees coming, is an illness (PDE) usually only discovered after this kind of death happens. The lone blessings in this are that a) usually pugs who are only 2 or 3 get it and die from it, so she had a far, far longer life than most who have it, and b) her death would have been very quick and relatively painless.

In any event, it was just kind of one more thing on top of everything else that just made...well, everything too much for me. I've been very depressed since, and just unable to do much of anything, feeling like I don't have anything to offer anyone right now. I'm so sorry to any of you who were working with me through your own things and who I left hanging.

Tomorrow, I head out of town for just over a week to do a bunch of talks. Tough timing for me, to have to be on right now when I'd really rather not climb out of bed, but I'm going to pull myself up by my bootstraps, get it together and do it. I lived in the city I'm heading to for several years, so will also have some time with good friends. That, and getting away from a house that feels so empty right now, should help, and I hope to come back at the end of next week able to shift back into work here slowly and with some semblance of the energy and patience I usually have.

Again, my apologies, and we all also owe big thanks to all of our volunteers who have worked really hard to pick up my slack lately. If everyone could give them some extra rope, and also maybe too do your best to help the volunteers help and support your fellow community members in my absence, I'd deeply appreciate it.

I'm looking forward to being back here soon, and I hope this finds everyone well.

[ 04-30-2012, 09:50 AM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Atonement
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 42492

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Big hugs, Heather!

You're so wonderfully helpful to me, and i realize that I usually tend to think of you as some sort of superwoman that has all the answers. And maybe, because of that, I take advantage of you a little bit.

I'm really sorry to hear about your dog. I know how much you love your pets, and that this unfortunately isn't the first time during out e-friendship that you've lost one.

So, once again, hugs! I hope your time away is good, and if the city you're going to happens to be Chicago, say hello to it for me!

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moonlight bouncing off water
Peer Ambassador
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quote:
Originally posted by Atonement:
You're so wonderfully helpful to me, and i realize that I usually tend to think of you as some sort of superwoman that has all the answers. And maybe, because of that, I take advantage of you a little bit.

I concur because I too tend to think of you as superwoman. You're no less of a superhero now though, you're simply a superhero who needs to be her own superhero right now.


Thanl you so, so much for all that you do. I don't think that I can accurately put into word what it is that Scarleteen has given me. I came here when I was just begining to come out to myself, back when I still had a ton of deep-seeded internalised homophobia. I had never experienced a comunity quite like Scarleteen where being queer was just as common as not. I love Scarleteen. Thank you for all that you do, you are amazing.

And I hope that things start getting better for you and easier to handle. Please take care of yourself and don't take on too much. You need to care for yourself first. Go you for taking the time that you need to deal with everything that you have going on in your life.

You are amazing!

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~moonlight

I am ME and that is the only label I need.

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Sans
Peer Ambassador
Member # 91788

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Many hugs from me!

I'm so sorry to hear about all of the tough stuff that's been happening, especially your pug!I don't personally own a pet, but a friend of mine has recently lost her cat. I think I can relate, even a little. -more hugs-

I hope that you enjoy your time with friends and get a good chance to relax. You sound like you've been working so, so hard.

-even more hugs-

I also hope that, when you're back, you will feel much better. As much as I love all of our volunteers and members, it's just not the same not having you around.

-lots more hugs-

Take care of yourself, Heather!

[ 04-30-2012, 08:22 PM: Message edited by: SansNom ]

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"Sneak away, sneak away / If the fate is too sad / You are not a flower of hell / That kind of place... / Don't become lost, don't become lost... / Or you won't be able to grasp the entangled hand / The cry also has a limit...." - Naraku no Hana

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Jill2000Plus
Activist
Member # 41657

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I'm so sorry Heather, I hope you get the time you need to process this and heal. Remember you have the right to take care of yourself.

I offer hugs if you want them, I would post some comforting piece of media, but I know the site has rules about copyright.

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Always knock before entering my room when I am in there alone, as I may be doing all sorts of wonderfully thrilling things that I'd rather you didn't see.

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WesLuck
Activist
Member # 56822

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My best wishes for you Heather. Any loss, whatever it is, requires grieving time. And you've already been through so much. Take the time you need, and I'll see if I can help out a bit on the web-site while you're away.

-super hugs for Heather "Max"-

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treetops
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Member # 44381

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I'm so sorry to hear this. I hope that you're feeling a bit better soon.
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WesLuck
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Member # 56822

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Heather, are you back now? I assume so because you've made some new posts. [Smile]
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Thanks so much to all of you for your kindness and support. I really, really appreciated it.

And yep: I just got home last night from all my work travel, and am going to slowly ease myself back in. [Smile]

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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WesLuck
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Gee that was quick. Less than two minutes after the last post. [Wink]
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Djuna
Activist
Member # 29269

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Welcome back Heather. Lots of organic granolary love to you. [Smile]

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“In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I don’t know what I am. I don’t know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.”

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Sans
Peer Ambassador
Member # 91788

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YAY!!! A very welcome back, Heather, and hoping that you are doing well! Lots of love from me too. [Big Grin]

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"Sneak away, sneak away / If the fate is too sad / You are not a flower of hell / That kind of place... / Don't become lost, don't become lost... / Or you won't be able to grasp the entangled hand / The cry also has a limit...." - Naraku no Hana

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moonlight bouncing off water
Peer Ambassador
Member # 44338

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Welcome back Heather! It's great to have you back, I've missed you being here! [Big Grin]

I hope you're feeling a bit better about all the stuff that's been going on with you.


Welcome, welcome, welcome back!!!!

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~moonlight

I am ME and that is the only label I need.

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Thanks so much, moonlight, Djuna and Sans. [Smile]

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Sans
Peer Ambassador
Member # 91788

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You're SO welcome! [Big Grin]

And I loved the fact that you called me "Sans"! It sounds way cooler than "SansNom". [Smile]

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"Sneak away, sneak away / If the fate is too sad / You are not a flower of hell / That kind of place... / Don't become lost, don't become lost... / Or you won't be able to grasp the entangled hand / The cry also has a limit...." - Naraku no Hana

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WesLuck
Activist
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So since "Sans" means "without" - she called you "Sans" without the Nom, or "Sans"Nom. [Wink] Pretty cool moniker you have there! [Smile]

[ 05-12-2012, 05:53 PM: Message edited by: WesLuck ]

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Sans
Peer Ambassador
Member # 91788

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Lol! Love the really cool word play! [Big Grin]

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"Sneak away, sneak away / If the fate is too sad / You are not a flower of hell / That kind of place... / Don't become lost, don't become lost... / Or you won't be able to grasp the entangled hand / The cry also has a limit...." - Naraku no Hana

Posts: 537 | From: Toronto, Canada | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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