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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Pregnancy and Parenting » Pregnant from wiped sperm on hands and fingering?

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Author Topic: Pregnant from wiped sperm on hands and fingering?
Layann
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Member # 107801

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Hm I'm really sorry if this is going to be a really dumb question but it's been bothering me.

So my boyfriend jacked off and came, he used napkins to wipe himself dry. Then we played Xbox for 30 minutes, I know gross he didn't wash his hands but he was too paranoid to move around the house cuz my mom was home. Then he had to go but before he left he got all yeah and wanted to finger me before he left. So dumb of me I was like um okay sure go for it. Then he fingered me. ): then he left and now I'm thinking OMG I'm ovulating according to my period app. So can I get pregnant this way? Getting fingered after he ejaculated on his hands, wiped, played games, and fingering me about 35-40 mins after ejaculation? & I was ovulating? I'm sorry hm.

One more thing, I took plan b the week before. I know it has no effect with protecting things afterwards but I'm sure it messed up my cycle so i don't know for sure if I really am ovulating. I took the plan b cuz he apparently did me like what he calls it a 10 sec sex on the second day of my period. My period isn't heavy for the first 2 days so it didn't bug him but it bugged me but apparently nothing stops him. So unprotected sex 2nd day of period, periods last 7 days and plan b taken (24 hours & 20 mins after sex) which made my period last 9 days instead. I don't know if this information makes anything different.

So I guess the question is what's the chances of pregnant from the wiped ejaculation during ovulation and not ovulating?

SORRY I KNOW IM REALLY STUPID BUT I LEARNED MY LESSON. Please help me? ):

[ 06-29-2013, 05:15 AM: Message edited by: Layann ]

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Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
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Hi Layann and welcome to Scarleteen,

Just for your information: No matter how short the intercourse is, and whether you're on your period or not, that's still a risk of pregnancy. You've reduced that risk by taking Plan B, but I would still suggest testing for pregnancy. You can expect an accurate result from a pregnancy test if you test 14 or more days after sexual activity that could lead to pregnancy.


Also, sexual activities without barriers (such as condoms) also pose a greater risk of STI (sexually transmitted infection) transmission. Are you and your boyfriend both up-to-date on your STI testing?


To answer your question: Fingering isn't a way someone can get pregnant. Here's some information on what does and doesn't pose pregnancy risks:

Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?


If you'd like, we can talk about using birth control methods other than emergency contraception.

--------------------
Robin

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Carpe Diem
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I just wanted to add... Your not stupid! Try not to put yourself down like that, you just asked a question, an beleive me, there ain't nothing stupid about that! I've never met you, but I'm sure you, but I'd bet my bottom dollar that you are a anything but stupid. [Smile]
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September
Scarleteen Volunteer
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Layann, I'd also like to check in with you to hear how your relationship with your partner is going, as you said some things in the post that set off my alarm bells, such as that you were uncomfortable with sex while you were on your period but that he went ahead anyway and that "nothing can stop him". Do you feel safe with your partner? Are you able to voice your boundaries, and does he respect them?

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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Layann
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Hey thanks everyone for your replies. Yeah I am up to date with my the STI's. But I'm planning on making an appointment with the clinic at the college when i start school for a check because I don't know if he's okay. So the fingering part with dried sperm can't get me pregnant? Hm I'm breaking up with him after this. I can't handle him he has no control. He cussed me out the other day and that's why I let him finger me cuz he was making a big deal of me not letting him touch me. Sometimes I think he's the one who needs like a doctor cuz if he doesn't get sex he gets super mad.

Oh maaaaaan ): the unprotected sex.. Trust me I've been living my life in regrets ever since that night. I tried to get him off me and once I did he just masturbated. The dumb part is he doesn't even consider that sex. He says it was nothing and it was just 10 seconds. From this experience I don't even want to be in a relationship anymore. I don't even like sex! & I'm dumb for letting him do those things to me. I feel extremely guilty, I'm trying to be the best daughter I can for my parents getting straight A's and keeping up with my scholarships but behind their back.. I'm a huge disappointment. So I can be pregnant from the period thing? D,; I'm sooo dumb.

Thank you for your replies & thanks for not judging me.

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Carpe Diem
Activist
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Nope, manual sex with some dried ejaculate cannot cause pregnancy, so rest assured there.
I'm so sorry that you were pressured into sexual activity that you were not otherwise comfortable with. But please don't think your dumb for giving into his manipulation. He put you in a situation that was so not cool and I know how hard it can be when you're in a relationship (that I would consider volatile and abusive based on the info you've said) to stand your ground when someone is manipulating you with anger and other jerky tactics to get their way.

--------------------
"Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain."
-Joseph Campbell

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Robin Lee
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Hey Layann,


It really does sound to me like your boyfriend wasn't at all considerate of you or your needs, or what you had to say about those needs. This doesn't sound like a happy, healthy relationship for you to be in. I concur with Carpe Diem
that you've described some abusive elements.

I'm glad to hear you'll be getting out of that relationship.

But you know, all of this doesn't make you a bad daughter or an overall disappointment. It makes you someone who tried something and discovered it wasn't what she wanted or liked. It makes you someone who had the bad luck of ending up in a relationship with someone who didn't show her respect; that's not about anything you did or didn't do. None of us knows what we'll want until we try it, and none of us is going to know how to deal with someone being pushy or even abusive until we've actually been in that experience.

You don't have to know everything all at once, okay? [Smile]

You did take Plan B after the sexual intercourse, yes? If so, your risk of pregnancy is low.

Have you had a period since then? If not, when do you expect it?

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Robin

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Layann
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Thank you all for your comfort. I felt like I was alone in this. I can't even tell anyone close to me of what happened. I even told him I was scared to get pregnant and he yelled and said I wouldn't. Sometimes I think things are better left in the past. He's my first boyfriend, first kiss, first everything and yet he treats me like trash. After this experience a boyfriend is the last thing I want right now. I don't understand why he enjoys sex it makes me wonder. Anyways I'm sorry but thank you all for your reassurance. So I'm okay? Just thinking about having a baby with him will be a living nightmare for me and the child. He probably won't even say it's his. I'm just afraid, afraid of everything.

My period according to my period app is supposed to start on July 13. For now I'm just living in isolation but thanks for all your comfort. It means so much to me. It gives me hope that there are still good people out there that won't judge or abuse you.

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Yipes, Layann, sounds like you've got some rough relationship stuff going on here, and also sound like you don't really want to be in this relationship anymore. Given some of what you're saying here, like a partner yelling at you with this, I can certainly see why you feel that way.

Is this something extra you want some help or support with? If so, we're happy to do that with you, too.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Layann
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Yes Heather, hm I broke up with him already. So we aren't talking anymore. So do you think my chances of pregnancy are slim? Sorry I know I keep asking but it just can't leave my mind. I want to start a new hm.
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Robin Lee
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Hi Layann,

I'm glad to hear you were able to break up with him so soon, since it sounded like that relationship just wasn't working for you or making you happy.

We've already discussed your pregnancy risks. There's really not much more we can say about that as far as the facts go. [Smile] If you'd like to be able to know for absolute sure whether you're pregnant or not, the only way to do that is to take a pregnancy test.

From the timeline you've given, it sounds like a pregnancy test would give an accurate result now. pregnancy tests are accurate 14 or more days after the sexual activity that put you at risk of pregnancy. Since, as we've already discussed, the fingering was not a pregnancy risk, you can count from the time there was intercourse.

So, how about getting a pregnancy test to put your mind at ease? Again, as we've discussed, you did use emergency contraception, which did reduce the likelihood of becoming pregnancy. It sounds like you really do need to know for sure, though, to be able to move forward from this.

--------------------
Robin

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Layann
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Member # 107801

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UPDATE: Hi everyone! I'd like to thank you for all your support, comforting words, advice, and respect. I didn't take a pregnancy test & decided to just wait for my period to come. I got my period today! [Big Grin] it was 3 days off schedule but it came! & I know it's my period because its a bit heavy. But I'd like to thank you!

& for those who may be going through this, I had a lot of mood swings. I'd be happy for one minute then the next I'd be crying or wanting to scream. I had really bad cramping after a week of taking plan b and it lasted all the way up till my flow started. So about 3 weeks and I had sore breasts. I guess it was all just from the plan b. Then when my period was supposed to start I was having clear discharge not a lot but just a little. Sometimes it'd feel like my period was coming but no, but that's how I am before I start. I always get clear discharge before a period. So the clear discharge lasted for 2 days then on the third I was dry then today I started! Yeah that's what I experienced. I'm relieved to say I survived & I'm never going down that road ever again.

Thanks again! (:

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Robin Lee
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So glad to hear you're so relieved! [Smile]

--------------------
Robin

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