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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Pregnancy and Parenting » Severe Anxiety Over Something Probably Not Possible

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Author Topic: Severe Anxiety Over Something Probably Not Possible
Kathryn2425
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So about 2 and a half months ago I gave my now ex bf a hand job that I didn't even want to do in the first place. I was wearing really short shorts and when he came, I think it was only on my shirt and I don't remember having any semen swap through my shorts or even touching it when it was still wet. I know that I masturbated that night and about a month after I realized that I thought I could've had a risk but my period came and was only a day late. I was still panicking about being pregnant because I read all this stuff online saying that women can still bleed during the same times that they get their periods and as heavy as their regular periods which made me freak out. I got another period after I found out that I had an ovarian cyst that was 3 days late. I'm still paranoid about being pregnant even though I've read over all of your forums saying that getting pregnant from manual sex is impossible with clothes on ad my therapist even told me that I wasn't pregnant but I have an anxiety disorder and haven't taken a test because I can't because of the cyst I have. I know that my chances are seriously unlikely but could you please help put my mind at ease or give me some places to seek help for this anxiety because it is seriously ruining my life. It starting to bother me so much that I am actually starting to believe that there is a baby growing inside me. Please help!

[ 07-04-2013, 07:25 PM: Message edited by: Karybu ]

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Karybu
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Hi Kathryn. I'm sorry you're having so much anxiety over this. If it will help to hear one more time, you are not pregnant. Pregnancy happens through direct genital contact, and that didn't happen: that's really all there is to it.

Honestly, with anxiety this severe, we're always going to suggest seeking help from a therapist or counsellor: you have a therapist, so I'd really encourage you to talk this through with them.

(I removed your email address from your post, by the way, for your safety; we don't allow users to post personal contact information on the boards.)

[ 07-04-2013, 07:30 PM: Message edited by: Karybu ]

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Kathryn2425
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Thanks, the only problem is that I'm mostly stressed because I don't really know what all happened that day because it was well over 2 months ago. I think it's just my nerves causing this, but the reason that I'm still anxious about it is because I feel like my stomach is getting harder in the center and I also feel a heart beat there which I think might be my own. Can I still be assured that I'm not pregnant even though I'm feeling this way? Is it just my nerves that are making this happen to me?
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Karybu
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Stress can have a lot of different effects on the body. In terms of not remembering what happened that day, it's safe to say that unless there was direct contact between your partner's penis and your vulva (which is something you'd very likely remember), then pregnancy is not a concern. Have you seen this piece yet? Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Kathryn2425
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Yes I actually have read that article and I'm absolutely positive that I had no genital to genital contact with my partner. Deep
In myself I tell myself that I'm not pregnant but right now I can't stop obsessing over the what-ifs from that day, if my period really isn't my period, and what if the semen dripped down into the side of my shorts and I didn't know about it. Does my 2 periods or what I think are periods assure me that I'm not pregnant?

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Karybu
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It's not possible to have periods and be pregnant, so yes, you can take that as another indication that you are not pregnant. It seems like having all this information isn't helping alleviate your anxiety though, so again, I'd suggest that you bring this issue up with your therapist again: they're the best person to help with this level of anxiety.

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Kathryn2425
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Thanks for your help, I really appreciate it and you've made me feel a little better too. I will try to speak to my therapist about my anxiety as soon as I can. Just one last question, how common is it for women to actually bleed as if it's their period when they are pregnant?
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Karybu
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Very uncommon. Bleeding can happen during pregnancy, but that bleeding does not generally resemble a period or happen when a period is expected. You haven't had a risk to begin with though, so talking about bleeding during pregnancy isn't relevant to your situation, and isn't likely to help your anxiety, you know?

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Kathryn2425
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Yeah you are right. Thanks for all your help! Am I completely safe to say that I'm not pregnant?
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Karybu
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Yes.

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Kathryn2425
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Thanks! That makes me feel a lot better and I will talk to my therapist about my anxiety over this as soon as I can.
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Karybu
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Glad to hear that. [Smile]

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Kathryn2425
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Just a question, but you said that pregnancies risks only happen when there is direct genital contact, but on other forums on this site, it says that it can happen from having someone ejaculate directly on or near a vilva or vagina. So just to be clear, if there is no direct genital to genital contact and no one ejaculated on an exposed vulva, then there is absolutely no risk?
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Haleigh H
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Hi Kathryn2425,

I think you will find this page really helpful.

Can I get Pregnant, or Get or Pass an STI From That . It help you asses the risks of different types of sexual activity.

Yes, genital to genital contact and ejaculation directly on or near a vulva or vagina present a high risk of pregnancy.

There is no pregnancy risk from the situation you described above. I think it would give you some piece of mind to read up on the risks from different sexual activity so that you can save yourself some stress in the future.

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Haleigh

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