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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Pregnancy and Parenting » question about miscarriage

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Author Topic: question about miscarriage
Ste-Funnie
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Hello. I have a couple of questions about when it comes to miscarriages. What is the minimum amount of months of pregnancy that is enough that if you fall down the stairs, or get hurt in other ways that can cause you to lose the baby? Also, if you are, I don't know, 4 or more months pregnant and you have a miscarriage, how exactly do they take the baby out?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Heather
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The idea that miscarriages happen because of things like falling down the stairs is based on myths, rather than realities.

Most often, miscarriage happens not because of anything anyone did, nor anything that happened to someone like an injury, but because in the course of a pregnancy, things were not just properly developing or continuing, something that has a lot ,more to do with genes and hormones and overall health than anything else.

There is no maximum or minimum amount of time like you're asking: miscarriage can happen at any point during a pregnancy.

And when miscarriage happens, that's about a pregnancy expelling itself. In very early miscarriage, there's usually nothing that needs be done because the products of conception expel themselves. (And the idea that there's anything in the uterus at 4 months that looks like a baby isn't accurate: a fetus at 16 weeks is only around five inches in length.)

Later on, while self-expulsion still is what happens -- that's what a miscarriage is -- sometimes a D&C will be needed to make sure all the contents of the uterus have been expelled, to assure the pregnant person doesn't get any kind of infection or other health issue. A D&C is part of a typical abortion procedure (and also sometimes done post-delivery, with a birth): it involves cleaning out the inside of the uterus, through the cervix, with an instrument designed for that purpose.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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Um, here's why I ast this. I'm writing a book, and it's about an abusive relationship, and one of them gets pregnant and the abusive one throws her down the stairs, which is how she, specifically lost the baby. I wasn't sure I pregnant I should make her in the story when she has the miscarriage. Also I wasn't sure how people take the baby out of you're very pregnant. So can you please explain it a little more?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Captain Girl
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Ste-Funnie, this may be more technical detail than you want for your project.

Early on in a pregnancy, the fetus is *incredibly* well protected. The uterus is entirely behind the bones of the pelvis until the end of the third month of pregnancy. So in the first trimester, any physical trauma that the mother can survive is extremely unlikely to harm the baby.

When fetuses die later in pregnancy, doctors will evaluate the situation and discuss the appropriate options with the pregnant women. Sometimes doctors will perform a D&C, but this is not always appropriate with later losses.

When a fetus dies in the second half of pregnancy, the baby gets out the same way it would if it were alive - the pregnant woman goes into labor (either naturally or induced), and gives birth to the dead baby.

Daniel Raeburn wrote an account of his daughter Irene's stillbirth that can be found here: http://www.rowantreefoundation.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=84&Itemid=2

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Heather
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Just an FYI for Ste-Funnie and other users: because we are short-staffed, if and when you're asking about things like this out of basic curiosity, or, like with this, for something that's your hobby, it'd be great if you could let us know that so we don't race to answer as we would if and when this is a real-life issue for someone, okay? Thanks!

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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What exactly is D&C?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Captain Girl
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Ste-Funnie, if you, or someone else, was going through this, I would answer questions very gently all day, but it's a painful topic, and I don't think you understand how specific and personal the answers to your general questions can get.

You can find information about D&Cs, and other surgical procedures related to pregnancy loss (and the physical and emotional experience of pregnancy loss, with and without medical intervention), very easily on Google.

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Ste-Funnie
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Wow. Well, this is just a book. It's fiction. It doesn't have to be truly realistic. The part about how they take the baby out, I don't have to give deets, just I wasn't sure how pregnant I should make her.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Captain Girl
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Please respect the people you are asking questions of enough to care about how they feel about the answers.
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Ste-Funnie
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What are you talking about? I was agreeing with you. I mean, I wish you'd answer all my questions about this, but I so respect u.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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The point is, experiences with miscarriage are not fictions for everyone, Ste-Funnie. For some of us, they are real-life experiences, and for some people, they have been traumatic real-life experiences.

So, when you're asking people about something sensitive like this, it's really important you ask with a lot of sensitivity, and try and talk about things like this without being or sounding flip. Statements like "Well, it's just a book," would be an example of being flip, if that's unclear.

Really, since you're asking about something that's about a hobby, not a personal experience, like CaptainGirl I think you've been given quite a lot of information to start with here, and can easily use it to do some more research on your own with a search engine or at a library at this point. Thanks.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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Um, ok. When I said "fiction" I meant my book is fiction and not a true story. And in the book, the woman does go through a lot of trauma. Enough that she left her fiance, because her fiance pretty much caused it. But either way, thanks for giving me some help on this. I could look it up.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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Right, but you're talking about made-up characters -- which you didn't disclose you were from the start of this conversation, no less -- with real people, some of whom may have/have (I don't know about CaptainGirls' experience nor what she might or might now want to disclose about them, but I can speak for myself and say this has been part of my life) had these experiences. In other words, you have an emotional distance with something often very sensitive others do not or may not have.

So, when we're in a dynamic like that, and we know we're asking about something potentially traumatic, we need to tread lightly. You haven't been.

Hopefully now you know that, and we can move forward. And for now, I think the easiest way to do that is just to close this thread, since this *is* about a fiction, and not about someone actually needing help.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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