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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Pregnancy and Parenting » To be or not to be?

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Author Topic: To be or not to be?
CubanBoobiGIRL
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Member # 7587

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My boyfriend is 17 and im 15, he goin off to college next year and im scared we're gonna have to break up. i've never felt for anyone like i feel for him and sometimes i feel like i want a part of him. sometimes i feel like i want his baby but i kno his not ready for one, my mom said she wants me to see what it would be like to have one without goin all the way and actually i want to also.is there anyway i can do this?
Posts: 23 | From: melb,fl,U.S.A | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Aria51
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 653

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Do you have any friends with babies? Talk to them. Ask them how it is. Offer to babysit overnight for them. They'll greatly appreciate it, and you'll get some persepctive on just how it feels to be tired and cranky with a little tired and cranky person screaming at you.

Seriously, if you're wanting to have his baby because you think it will preserve the relationship, you're going to have to do a little re-thinking there, sweetie. Very few teenage mothers are able to marry the fathers of their babies, and an alarming number have to go it alone.

Read this article; specifically, page 5:
http://www.scarleteen.com/reproduction/pregnancy.html


Posts: 1287 | From: Missouri | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
goblin_girl01
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Well... I undestand your situation w/ your b/f (Mine is going away to college in September), but a baby is a really BIG step. You'll be this kid's mom now, in five years, and in twenty years. It can really change your life.
My mom just had a kid (he's exactly 16 years younger than I am) and he's ultra-cute.. and an ultra-pain. I love him to death, but just taking care of him once in a while when he's whiney is a good way of keeping me childless for a VERY LONG TIME!
A baby is more responsibility than most people our age have ever dealt with.. this is something I realized very quickly after my little bro's birth. They are completely helpless without you and your entire day(week, month, year) must be planned around HIS schedule. Not fun. Not easy.
So PLEASE do yourself a favor and think about this REALLY hard.. you owe it to yourself.

PS. Not to be overly negative, but what happens if your b/f isn't compelled to stay w/ you? Then where are you, and your new kid?


Posts: 13 | From: Boulder, CO | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Dude_who_writes
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Member # 5640

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quote:
Originally posted by goblin_girl01:
love him to death, but just taking care of him once in a while when he's whiney is a good way of keeping me childless for a VERY LONG TIME!

Ha! I knew I wasn't the only one who used his little brothers as examples to never have unprotected sex. They really are the best pro-birth control advertisement.

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Tim

"Take sex for example. There's nothing funnier than the faces you people make mid-coitus." -- Metatron (Dogma)


Posts: 712 | From: Michigan, US | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Angelic Yooper
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One way I found out that I didn't want to have a baby now is I was asked to watch 2 young children for a whole weekend without help. One was 4 months old, the other 4. It was the most stressing weekend of my life and I know now that before I have children I am going to make sure I'm in a solid relationship and be done with school. Its too much work for now.
A girl I know just had a baby a few months ago. She's 14. Her mother takes care of him while she goes to school. She is no longer with her boyfriend-they broke up shortly before the baby was born and had always promised they would be together 'forever'. He's going to college next year I believe. She has to take care of him when she gets home because her mom says its her responsibility. And a lot of parents aren't always understanding enough to watch the child for you. I hope you do think this over and make the decision you feel is best.

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!~*Dani*~!

In order to love someone, you must first love yourself


Posts: 8 | From: United States of America | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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