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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Emergencies and Crises » Do I need to be worried? (Page 2)

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Author Topic: Do I need to be worried?
Sweetly92
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Hey guys, I'm still concerned with this whole thing! I'm still very worried about everything and I don't know how to cope with this. I feel like for some reason the loose stools I had will somehow compromise the effectiveness of my pills. I feel like such a failure. I can't even be happy because I feel like everyone in my life will hate me in just a couple of weeks. I feel like I made such a big mistake and I can't stop beating myself up over it. Every time I start to feel positive about my situation, I start to over analyze everything and start to think "what if". I was looking up information on medical abortion, but I feel like it would probably be something that I just wouldn't be able to do, and I don't think I would be able to cope with giving up my child for adoption. Although I am twenty and considered an adult, I feel like my parents would be so disappointed in me, especially since they have been so proud of me lately. I guess I just need someone to talk to.
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Sounds like you've got stuff going on that is WAY bigger than concern about a loose stool and your pill. We a;ready ghave you the info about that, and you already had the same info before you came here. I suspect that isn't helping much because what you're upset about is whatever bigger stuff is going on.

Why will everyone in your life hate you in a couple weeks?

Why do you think you're fixating on a possible pregnancy when it isn't realistically at all likely?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Sweetly92
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I'm not sure, I guess I feel like I have horrible luck and im very likely to end up pregnant. The loose stools were hours after taking my pill not immediately after. I guess what's really freaking me out is the fact that I've done way too much research and I've seen so many stories about how people have become pregnant on the pill. My parents would hate me if I got pregnant before I am even married, and I'm concerned that my grandmother would likely give up on life if something like that were to happen. I just wish I could get over anxiety. It's hard for me to separate legitimate fears with ones that are not so realistic. I want to see a therapist, I guess I'm just afraid they would think that I'm crazy. Recently I even thought i had cancer because I looked up my symptoms on the Internet and they correlated.

I guess the fact that my pill is generic and low dose also has me worried that they aren't effective, and today I felt like I had slight cramps and didn't know if that could be the signs of the beginning of a pregnancy. I'm not supposed to get my withdrawal bleed for another 11 days.

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Heather
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Okay, so one thing you know you need to do is to STEP AWAY FROM THE INTERNET. (Especially since I'm betting that research a) wasn't primarily done at actual reproductive health sites with educated providers and educators talking about this and b) also didn't involve a library.)

In other words, your "research" is clearly making you sick, emotionally-speaking. And it's only going to hurt instead of help, especially with something already in the past.

It also sounds like you could stand to see a therapist about your anxiety. Pro-tip: it's not mental health professionals who think people are "crazy." You're putting the stuff of people who don't work in that field on people who do, and have much different attitudes, okay?

Generic medications are just as effective as name-brands, ALL combined BCPs are low-dose now (and all have the same effectiveness), and there are no "signs" of a beginning pregnancy.

I think you'd be best served by seriously, stepping away from looking this stuff up endlessly on the net, especially at sites where the information likely isn't verified and credible, putting your energy into other things as much as you can, and maybe putting some of it into finding out what mental healthcare resources are within your reach.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Sweetly92
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Ive been trying to take your advice, and have avoided searching the Internet. However, I do want to ask a couple more questions: first, if I were to somehow become pregnant by this situation would breast tenderness likely begin 7 days after my risk? Even though I am on birth control pills, I usually begin having breast tenderness about 8 days before my withdrawal bleed and I wanted to know if this is what I'm likely feeling? Or should I be worried that I have conceived. Sorry for being annoying, just wondering .
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Heather
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Have you taken a look at this, Sweetly?

Chicken Soup for the Pregnancy Symptom Freakout's Soul

It answers questions like that, but also explains why looking for pregnancy "symptoms," period, just isn't sound.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Sweetly92
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Yes I looked at that link a while back ago, I just hate waiting to get my withdrawal bleed. It's so frustrating. That does answer a lot of questions though. Thank you!
Also, how is it possible to have premenstrual symptoms while on the bc pill? I've always wondered this!

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Heather
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Because the pill doesn't take away your cycle or the hormonal cycles you have, it just makes some adjustments to them.

Plus, when it's about time for your withdrawal bleed, the pill really isn't doing anything that different to your body in terms of where levels of hormones are at then the body normally does to itself at that stage of the menstrual cycle.

It is SUPER-oversimplifying to put it this way (and thus, accurate per the general gist of these things in the broadest way, but not in the real science of them), but if it helps you to understand it better, it's kind of like in the first half of your cycle, the pill is convincing your body you're already pregnant. Then in the second half, just like the second half when we're not on the pill and also not pregnant, it's telling your body it's not pregnant and that a period is on the way.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Sweetly92
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That makes sense! Thank you heather! I also wanted to apologize if I frustrated you earlier in the week. I'm just going through a lot of different emotions right now.
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Heather
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You didn't at all, no worries. The only folks I felt frustrated with were your friends!

But I appreciate you thinking about it. [Smile]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Sweetly92
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Also, why is it that diarrhea affects bc pills? Is it because it may not get absorbed in time? Just curious.
If everything works out in the end and I get my period, I was thinking about getting an iud implant, is it just as effective and reliable for people who have never given birth?

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Robin Lee
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With true diarrhea, which isn't just loose stools but is food and drink basically go through the body without being absorbed, yes, that's why the pill may not be as effective. There's no way to know what if anything is getting absorbed.

The IUD is just as effective in preventing pregnancy regardless of whether one has given birth before. If it's an option you're considering for yourself, you could make an appointment with your doctor, or, if you don't have a doctor, go to a clinic to discuss whether it is a good option for you.

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Robin

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Sweetly92
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Thanks for the info robin, also I thought that I should let you know that I talked to my boyfriend about abstaining from intercourse for a while and he understood my concerns. He feels really bad about what happened and has been really supportive. AND when we do decide to have sex again, we will make sure we use condoms with spermicide! Thank you guys for your support!
And for future reference, a long as the diarrhea happens hours after taking a pill, I should still be covered?

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Robin Lee
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Again, loose stools are different from diarrhea, since diarrhea is continuous, or continuous episodes, over a period of time. But yes, loose stools several hours after taking your pill won't affect things at all.

And just for your information, condoms with spermicide haven't been found to be greatly more effective than condoms by themselves. Spermicide can also cause vaginal irritation for many people. So when and if you do decide to resume vaginal intercourse, if you find that you experience irritation from the spermicide, know that you can go without the spermicide and still be just as protected. IN other words, spermicide doesn't really decrease pregnancy risks when used with condoms and the birth control pill, but if it gives you more peace of mind and your body can tolerate it, that's perfectly okay.

For now though it sounds like not having intercourse is what's going to give you peace of mind.

...and you're most welcome. I'm glad you found our support and information helpful.

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Robin

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Sweetly92
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Thanks for that info, i definitely wouldn't want added irritation for no reason.
I'm definitely not going to have sex for a while.
I think I finally understand now, diarrhea is basically what happens when you have a stomach bug and can't keep anything down for long periods of time, not simply from a reaction from caffeine or anxiety!

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Robin Lee
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Re diarrhea:: Yes, that's exactly what we're talking about.

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Robin

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Sweetly92
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When would a pregnancy test likely be accurate? Do I have to wait 14 days after the risk? Or is 10 days good enough? I'm really having a hard time waiting this out, and I'm making myself crazy
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Robin Lee
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Well, you can take a pregnancy test any time you want. [Smile] However, all the information we have is based on pregnancy tests being expected to be accurate 14 or more days after a risk, so that may affect how well you trust the result of the test as well as how accurate the test can be deemed to be.

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Robin

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Sweetly92
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Is it possible to skip your withdrawal bleed as a result of severe stress? I'm worried that I may end up skipping it because I've been so incredibly stressed about my situation? My withdrawal bleed should be here on the first but all my usual Pms symptoms have vanished? Should I be concerned?
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Heather
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It's possible to have late or missed periods or withdrawal bleeds any time, on the pill or off.

That said, missing "because of stress," isn't really because of stress, but because of how we often manage it, or, more to the point, mismanage it. In other words, a lot of times stressed-out folks sleep less well or sleep less or more, eat more or less... change lifestyle routines, and our menstrual and fertility cycles tend to really rely a lot on those routines per their regularity.

So, you CAN manage your stress, if you aren't already.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Sweetly92
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If you don't mind me asking, I was wondering how diarrhea can effect the pill if it happens hours after taking it. You guys have told me that the loose stools I had didn't count as diarrhea... Is this because it lasted less than 24 hours and occurred several hours after taking my pills?
I'm extremely confused. Can diarrhea affect bc pills even when they have already made it into the blood stream?

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Robin Lee
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Diarrhea is actually ongoing loose stools, not just one episode happening at a specific time. We're not experts on the digestive system here but basically the digestive system sort of shuts down when someone has diarrhea so it's possible to have medications not be properly absorbed as they make their way through the stomach and intestines.

If you wanted to understand diarrhea more, you could do some research online with some reputable sources. Some reputable sources include the Mayo Clinic, webmd.com, National Institutes of health, and others.

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Robin

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Sweetly92
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Okay, so given the info I gave you about the loose stools and softer stool I had the next day you'd still say I was protected? My breasts have been really sore all day and in worried its from pregnancy. I'm supposed to get my withdrawal bleed in two days. In getting very nervous
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Robin Lee
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Sore breasts can be from all sorts of things, and pregnancy is pretty low on the list. IN other words, pregnancy symptoms don't generally show up this early, and when they do, they generally do not start with sore breasts.

Have you seen this piece?


Chicken Soup for the Pregnancy Symptom Freakout's Soul

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Robin

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Sweetly92
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Yes I have taken a look at that. I guess that it is likely that I'm just experiencing Pms symptoms. I've never been this worried in my life, and I guess I'm just gonna have to deal with it. I'm sorry if I've been a bother, I'm just going through a tough time and am so angry at myself for being in this situation.
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Robin Lee
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You're not being a bother. [Smile] Look around these boards and you'll find a lot of people with very similar concerns. That's not to downgrade your concerns, but to remind you that this is what we do. [Smile]

Having said that, I think it is important for you to remember that your withdrawal bleed isn't even due (let alone late) yet. I'm concerned about this high level of anxiety you're having when there has been no sign that anything is amiss and despite several assurances that what you thought was amiss rreally wasn't anything to worry about.

We talked a little bit about you finding support from a doctor or counsellor. What have you done on that front?

--------------------
Robin

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Sweetly92
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Ok I will search around. I understand that it's unlikely to have pregnancy symptoms this early. It's like deep down I know that, but I still have this doubt that eats away at me.

For some reason, I feel like my pills just aren't working this month due to the loose stools I had. But I'm assuming that even If they weren't fully absorbed, that enough would have been in there to keep me protected at least a little. I also didn't experience any spotting, so in assuming I'm okay. You guys truly wouldn't be worried if you we're in my situation? You would trust your pills?

I have not talked to anyone about my anxiety yet. My parents are very nosy, and would bother me until I told them why I am going. I'm on their insurance so they would eventually find out. My anxiety was pretty under control until I went through this scare. I don't know who to go to.

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Robin Lee
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Hi There,

As we've told you several times, what you described wouldn't impact your pills in any way. If you'd like confirmation of that, you could certainly talk to a pharmacist or a doctor.

Speaking of a doctor, that might be a good place for you to start if you wanted to go talk to someone about your anxiety. Yes, your parents would know that you went, but they don't have to know why you went. If anything, it sounds like you might want to have a chat with your doctor about the type of birth control you're using, since you're having a lot of anxiety around and distrust of your pills.

Considering that you're having this degree of worry about becoming pregnant, what do you think about taking a break from sexual activities that could lead to pregnancy?

--------------------
Robin

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Sweetly92
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Hello, once again I have another question. Yesterday, I had a but of brownish spotting. I'm due for my withdrawal bleed this week, but I've never had this brown spotting before. I woke up this morning and I checked, and I'm still in the Same boat. My periods have always started off bright red, what do you think this could be?
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Onionpie
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It's very common for periods and withdrawal bleeds to vary from time to time, so since your bleed is due this week, it's very likely that your spotting is the beginning of your withdrawal bleed.

Did you see Robin's latest reply? What do you think of her last suggestion, the possibility of taking a break from sexual activities that could lead to pregnancy, because of your amount of anxiety around possible pregnancy? Do you think that might be good for you to try?

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