I used to be generally happy. I loved life, I loved the people I was around. In the last four months I have been getting angry so much. Well, I am nore angry at my mom than anyone else. I have no reason to be, but for some reason I cannot stand to be around her. She has done nothing that I am aware of, or at least that I can remember. I just want to know why I am so angry at her. Every now and then, I get mad at other people as well. Most of the time for no reason. I don;t hate these people I just ge mad and lash out. I am 21 and there is no reason for this.
-------------------- Are there really people that care, or is it just a game to them? Posts: 16 | From: Ohio | Registered: Apr 2007
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quote: The last time I tried to tell my mom about the first time it happened I was told that I was lying. I ended getting called a slut.
Could this explain in part why you have those feelings of angriness towards her ? When did she tell you that ? What do you happen to be thinking about what you start feeling angry ?
Have you been under a lot of stress lately ? Something important happened 4 months earlier ? (Maybe not and it's ok)
I don't know how often this happens to you but if this angryness is getting bothersome and happens quite often then here's what I think about it. It's my opinion and I could totally be wrong though. But from what I've learned and know about you, here's hypothesis as to why you might be feeling that way.
Sometimes, we are angry towards one or few person but yet it shows as if we were angry at everyone. Or sometimes we are angry because of a certain situation (not a person) that happened, and this angryness is displaced towards other people with no apparent reason. It's a defense mechanism.
Maybe you have no reason to be angry at your mom now even considering what happened with her-- maybe it's not about that-- but yet are angry because of other things, like for example a certain thing that happened to you (like maybe a rape or could be other things too which could be find out by counseling), even if it doesn't appear to you as such, and this angryness happens to show towards people which aren't related in any way to what happened to you. It explains why it's just so complicated to explain why you are angry towards almost anyone and everyone, it's because it could all resides in your subconscious and the things there are often out of reach of your conscious.
It's not unhealthy, everyone uses some defense mechanisms. It helps us deal with stress and anxiety and such feelings we have. But some are healthier than others. Like if it is bothering you a lot, then it isn't that healthy I guess.
An hypothesis I have is, is that it could have a link with all you've been going through lately, be it dealing with your rapes or other things, and that it could be how you deal with all that unconsciously. I'm guessing it's a defense mecanism YOU use (not everyone will) in order to deal with certains hard situations that are happening or that happened to you for example. Let's not draw conclusions too fast though.
Whatever the reason as to why you're feeling that way may be, if it happens often and is borthersome, then I think psychotherapy/counseling could really help. It can help you understand this all better (find the reason as to why you're feeling like that, I can't tell here) and get feelings off your chest, help you feel better, what have you. The results can only be positive.
Without a complete amnamnesis of you here, I can't really tell you WHAT exactly explains your feelings right now. And I don't have enough bagage for that. And I think neither do you right now or will likely be easily able to without help. So saying it could have something to do with your rape or a certain situations that happened to you if it's not about stress or your mom are only hypothesis based on what I know about you here.
Counseling is something that has been suggested to you in your other tread and this is something that I think could help you here too making all this a bit more clear plus in dealing with your rapes, so I am wondering if this is something you've been thinking about doing ?
And, btw, hang on SocialReject, we are all here to support you.
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