She fell into my life, like an angel who had lost her sense of direction. " This game," I thought, " is still so new to me,... but why does it feel so natural?"
I haden't dated once before, so a girl that was considerably older than me,asking me out,... dating me... I felt like a fish out of water at first. I didn't know what to expect, I didn't know what was expected of me, but my heart led me.
She, she saved me from the downward spiral of dispair. I was, am , still so naieve. She was to leave soon, but I hoped I, we could have lasted.
She took me, and in an embrace of true love, we showed each other our true feelings. She was to leave in the following week. she told me she loved me... * sigh *
I haven't heard from her since her departure. I loved her, but I cannot shake this feeling that deep inside her, she hates me.
It's been six months, and though countless girls have told me otherwise, I still feel so ugly,... so remote, so... useless.I feel like with her departure, she took my ability to love with her.
I feel like a piece of meat, a used up rag doll, and though I have looked to the depths of my mind, and soul, I still connot find the answer as to why.
Please, someone, help me answer this enigma that befuddles me so
------------------ I would hope for a normal day, unfortunately, I would remember this day with terrible clarity
Note from Miz. S.: This WAS rude. Your attitude twoards this poster, and what you stated about women. And totally unacceptable here, especially in support groups.
I have edited it out for all of our benefits. In the future, please do not post in support groups unless you can offer support, and please don't speak to experiences you have not had. It is less than helpful.
[This message has been edited by Miz Scarlet (edited 05-02-2001).]
Let's remember that this forum is called Support Groups and try to be a little more supportive.
Loss in any form is painful. It could be the loss of a family member by death. The loss of a friend. And, yes, the loss of a partner. And that type of emotional pain can take a long time to heal. IATR, hang in there. Remember the good times you had with her, and find joy in them. You seem to be a very poetic person, so perhaps writing out your feelings in a journal or something of the sort would help you to feel better. Hope it all works out for you.
------------------ I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.
I apologize for my rude post. And scarlet won't let me post here anymore unless I was being supportive of what happened to you.
Just to let you know, I think there's a better way than just looking back at the past. We all have experienced painful moments and it's easier said than done that you'd be considerate enough to see what kind of person you really are.
I think a lot of girls would find you romantic. Look, we all had our fair shares of ups and downs. Even I have had them and I still do... but looking back at life and just looking really hard... I realized that the people you love will change as you grow. And there's no point turning back and getting what you want again, coz you can't change people... only people change themselves.
And another sidenote: If you don't ever want to listen to my advice, then you possibly won't be hearing from me anymore.
Wow, you know what, that sounded like a beautiful poem to me for some reason, unless I am going crazy. I think the way you put it just sounded like one. Are you a poet by any chance?
I agree with Aria, remeber what you had with her. It will take sometime, but your pain will soon go away.
Antonio, some people have a hard time not thinking about the past, and it takes their own time for them to heal. You can't tell somebody to move on with their pain, its not as easy as that. (does that make sense?)
You learn as you grow.
------------------ *~*~12/3/99*~* *~*~*~I LOVE YOU BOB FOREVER AND ALWAYS*~*~*~
"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't" -Erica Jong<~~~no thats not me :)
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