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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » Marital Rape

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Author Topic: Marital Rape
lilnerd
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We had a guest speaker come in to our global studies class last week and she discussed her trip living in, basically, "the slums" of Africa. Besides the fact that they do pretty much nothing about rape it is clearly known that there is "No Such thing as Marital Rape." What is marital rape? (Or what one may consider marital rape) It's when a man and woman are married and he forces sex on her. In Africa it is not only unheard of but is considered a responsibility of a wife to please her husband whenever he wishes. Do you believe in the term 'marital rape' and should there be something done about it? (There have been cases in the U.S. as well)

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[This message has been edited by lilnerd (edited 04-05-2001).]


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Heather
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Great topic, lilnerd.

And thankfully, in The States, Cnada and most of Europe (I recall there are one or two countries that don't recognize this, but heck if I can recall which right now), rape is rape as far as the law goes. Doesn't matter if your husband or a stranger on the street does it, it is still rape and is a crime.

The real trouble is that even in that scenario, women who are raped by their husbands and FAR less likely to report it.

As far as rape statistics go, the great MAJORITY of rapes and pperpetrated by someone the victim not only knows but knows well, and husbands are right up on the top of that list.

But in order to really do something about it -- in this country or any other -- there has to be a clear understanding that women are not sexual currency, nore sexual property when they become wives. And sadly, in a lot of the world, and even here on or home turf, a lot of people do not understand that concept.

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ThisGuy
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Hey, get back in the kitchen, dammit!

I find it disturbing - especially given comments made by an Australian judge a few years ago. He effectively endorsed marital rape.

The fact is, married or not, both partners in a relationship have rights to their own bodies. Why is sexual violence any different to non-sexual assault?

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Lin
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Yes lilnerd. Fabulous topic.

Marital rape is fairly prevalent here because if I am not wrong, Muslim law allows it.

And alot of women are starting to say No. And that is good but I believe that alot of women still feel that it is their responsibility to provide for their husband's sexual needs and thus see marital rape as something that they have to put up with.

But I think alot of men as well do not understand what is marital rape because they think rape is when a man forces sexual intercourse on a 12 year old girl in a darkened stairwell. THey just don't see themselves in that position so maybe it is time to educate the men and let them know what is rape.


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$uMMeR
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Marital rape exists here. I live in Malaysia, which is becoming more and more liberal minded by the day, and there are cases heard of where a woman is raped by her husband. Women are talking out more about it. That is good.

Unfortunately, some women still do not wish to talk about it as it says in the Quran women should be obedient to their husbands.

This is where people become confused. The Quran has been interpreted in many ways; I can't say it has been misinterpreted because other extremists or other Muslims may argue I have misinterpreted it.

I actually believe religion should have nothing to do with making laws; people should have choices because, no offence to anyone religious here, I think God Himself would like us to make choices about the way we live our lives (to an extent - I better stop talking about this soon, this is one huge debate), not do it just because a law is forcing us to.

quote:
But I think alot of men as well do not understand what is marital rape because they think rape is when a man forces sexual intercourse on a 12 year old girl in a darkened stairwell. THey just don't see themselves in that position so maybe it is time to educate the men and let them know what is rape

I agree 100% with Lin on this statement, especially in Asian countries. I'm very sad to have to say it, but it happens A LOT. Probably a lot more than we think.

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Confused boy
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I suppose it depends to a certain extent how marriage is considered culturally. Many of us in our cosy Western culture will view marriage as something that is supposed to take place on equal footings between two people that love eachother and respect eachother. In these conditions I believe marital rape is quite unlikely to happen. However, in places were marriage is considered to be more ownership of a woman then not only is it more common, its pretty much institutionalised. Its strange how such different meanings can be ascribed to the same word.
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