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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Abuse & Assault » Is this abuse?

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Author Topic: Is this abuse?
amz85
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Member # 41450

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Sorry, you've maybe covered this in another topic but I want to ask for myself. When I was 14/15 I was bullied at school and was in a church band. A guy at this band who was 23/24 starting texting me and gave me a naked photo of himself, I was very innocent and hadn't ever had a boyfriend or kissed a boy or anything, I was very lonely and around this time, can't remember if it was before or after all this started I was cutting myself. Well anyway it progressed and I ended up going to his house a couple of times and meeting up and he kissed me and performed sexual acts on me and I had to do this on him. It was all consensual though I wasnt really forced but I didnt like it, we never had sex. This happened for quite a while and I know he was doing it with my friend too. At the time I thought I was being grown up and had one over on the friends who were bullying me at school but when I look back now it makes me feel sick, he wasnt even good looking. He moved on from me to a younger girl and I think he'd done it before me too and he had pictures of girls in positions at his house. It affects me now becuase I feel disgusting and worthless and makes me feel horrible and dirty and disgusting when I cum during sex with my boyfriend. Was this abuse? I tell myself that I am being overdramatic and stupid but the guy I'm seeing said I should sort this out. Obviously it was a long time ago now. Is there anything I can do to help? I am worried that he is still doing it to girls.
Thank you
x

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