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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » Our Archives » Ask a Sexpert Archive » Help!!!

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Author Topic: Help!!!
Member # 629

Icon 4 posted      Profile for ShyGirl15     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Ok, last night i was with my boyfriend and he said will u give me a hand job and i said i will tonight but i said i will tonight but i don't know what to do??? can anyone help???? he also said if i gave him a hand job that he would eat me out. what does that mean im so stupid casue i don't know alot of stuff.
THanks to whoever can help me!!!!

Posts: 5 | From: Chicago,IL | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 7

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Mophead     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Oh my God! People!

First of all, will you please search the topics before posting? I'm sure we've answered this before.

Now, you said you want to give the guy manual sex. Well, this is not a Cosmo magazine, we don't give "secret tips and tricks." Just do what comes naturally, and ask him. And just because you don't know something does not make you stupid.

Why didn't you ask him what it was? Wouldn't he have told you? Are you afraid of him or something?

Femalepleaser, please, tone down the language.


Posts: 752 | From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 459

Icon 4 posted      Profile for WildChica     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Mophead, I totally agree with you. And Femalepleaser...Obviously you're new here. I really think you need to read the rules here at Scarleteen.
Posts: 87 | From: San Jose, CA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 233

Icon 13 posted      Profile for BabyAngel84     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Miz scarlet will not be to happy with this topic..she doesn't want people givin advice on things like hand jobs or oral sex...she will probably close this topic asap!!
Posts: 161 | From: Kenosha, Wisconsin, USA | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Femalepleaser, your comments have been deleted. I'd suggest you review the rules of the board you agreed to when you registerd.

Hi, Shy.

You'll note that at Ask a Sexpert, and on the agreement you clicked on when you registered that we cannot and will not answer technique questions here, and let me tell you why.

The MOST important reason is because it just isn't possible to give a set of directions that are applicable for everyone, and just like when you take a test at school and use a cheat sheet you miss out on really getting the bigger concepts, the same applies here. Every partner you will have in your lifetime will be different. Every single one.

We all are built a little differently, have different levels of sensitivity, structure and experience, and we want different things with nearly every partner. The only way to find out what is good for any one partner is to experiment and ask questions. So, in your case, all you need to know is that a "hand job" involves stimulating your boyfriend's penis and/or testicles with your hand. He may like gentle rubbing or rough, slow or swift, wet or dry...I could go on forever. But it's a whole lot easier to deal with anything new if we don't walk in with a lot of preconceptions.

Do what feels good to you, and ask if it feels good to him. If he says it does, you're obviously doing fine. If he says it doesn't, ask him to show you what HE likes to do. This is the way we all learn,. and if instead of coming to things that way, we come to acts as if our partners were automotons, we miss out on the whole point of having a sexual partner, which is intimacy and communication. If we aren't up for that, masturbating is the better thing to do.

The other, and lesser, reason we do not answer questions like that is to preserve the integrity and tone of this site. We have a wide range of ages here, and a step-by-step for a sex act just isn't appropriate for the low end, and most people cannot give even basic guidelines benignly enough to make it okay for everyone. Lastly, all over the site we teach about how the "tips and tricks" you see plastered all over the world are largely to get ppeople's attention, or to get them to buy something, and very few of them are written by sex educators, because we know better.

In addition, because we're talking about sex with minors, there are things that are appropriate, and things that are not. Very explicit language and directions (especially since they are useless) are not.

And as a note, other posters reminding people of the rules is perfectly fine by me.

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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