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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Need some advice

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Author Topic: Need some advice
Member # 54133

Icon 1 posted      Profile for hellokitty214     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 5 years now. Our relationship is great. We don't fight much, but lately we have been fighting over the littlest things. I think I have a bigger part in most of the fights. We don't have trust problems. I honestly don't know what it is. Like he's stubborn and so am I. Like I grew up spoiled and he calls me a "brat." Which I think I can be sometimes. I just like things my way. Like recently we had fight because he left me in his living room watching tv for an hour, while he was outside smoking with his friend. He leaves me for that long all the time. I get annoyed because he always does that. Like I drive all the way to his house and then after being there for like 10 minutes he goes outside or upstairs forever. Should I be upset or should I just relax? I've told him how I feel about him doing that and he doesn't think its a big deal because it's house and we have been together for a long time.

Another thing that gets me upset is that we don't go out on dates like we used to years ago. Like I can honestly say that we went out to a restaurant 3 times in the past year (my birthday, anniversary and his birthday). I know its not that he wants to go out in public with me, its more that he is "cheap" or also because he doesn't have a job. Like he doesn't buy me gifts and spoil me. I know I don't need anything, but like flowers or like a necklace or something would be great here and there. Every time I mention something about buying me things or going out me, he gets soo defensive and upset.

I love him to death and I dont know what I would do without him. We have never taken a break or separated, so that should tell you something. I just wish things could go back to how they used to be when we first started dating. Sorry this is soo long, but I don't have anyone to talk to about this.

Posts: 8 | From: East Coast USA | Registered: Jan 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 48970

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Britster     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Well, it sounds to me like you are out of the honeymoon period of the relationship. If you want to bring back more romance into the relationship, I suggest that you take the first step instead of wanting and waiting for your boyfriend to fill that role. If money is the problem, then do things that don't require extra money- like picnics, romantic notes, acting out plays from library books together, gosh I dunno- be creative!

It might also help to figure out what sorts of things make him and you feel most loved (like spending time together, gifts, verbal affirmation, favors, et cetera).

Posts: 89 | From: United States | Registered: Sep 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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