Donate Now
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Feeling pretty low.

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Feeling pretty low.
jbraid.
Neophyte
Member # 47402

Icon 9 posted      Profile for jbraid.     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I had a boyfriend for two years and we recently ended things. Since then, I had met someone else and we are currently dating. We're exclusive to each other and I told him that I do not wish to have sex with him anytime soon. He openly accepted my decision because he's a virgin and he figures if he's waited for 17 years, why not wait a little longer? And I'm so grateful for his respect for my wishes.

However, the two main reasons I've decided not to have have sex are because I don't want a relationship that's all about sex and, since my last boyfriend, I feel dirty. Everyone tells me I shouldn't because having sex with somebody I've been dating for 2 years is okay. But, we broke up a few times and he had protected sex with two other girls. I'm pretty sure I have no STDs and during my pap smear, my doctor tests the swab for chlamydia as well. And I'm sure I would have noticed if I had crabs, sores or anything.

But anyway, I just feel dirty. And I feel like my boyfriend deserves someone better than me and a virgin, like him. Being with him almost makes me feel guilty for having sex. When everyone, including my mother, tells me that I shouldn't feel dirty. What is wrong with me?

Posts: 25 | From: New Jersey | Registered: Jun 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Well, you've talked in a previous post about "giving in" to your boyfriend when it came to sex, and also not feeling good about your two previous sexual partnerships.

So, first things first: it sounds to me like so far in your sexual life you may not have had sex when it's what YOU really wanted and felt good about. Do you think that's true?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68237 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3