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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Life's not Going To Well

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Author Topic: Life's not Going To Well
Member # 42671

Icon 9 posted      Profile for MissShan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Well, When i Was About 16 {I Am no 19} i Found this site and wrote about my break up which had a major effect on me and advice helped me alot. so here i am again. writing about my sorrows, this time i feel are more serious then last though.

This is going to sound silly hence why i come on here rather then going to friends.. about four years ago i started talking to a guy online, we had so much in common (mainly we we were both cheeky as anything so just laughed at each other all the time.) time furthered on and i knew i started to develop feelings for him but felt stupid about this as we had never met due to the fact that he lived a little while away, i then got a booyfriend (which was the last topic i wrote about on here wheni was 16) and when he broke my heart this 'guy' who i had met online was there through me, we txd alot and became really close still finding more things we had in common. i then realised i was really falling for this guy. things happened and i found out he lied about nearly everything, his name wasnt what he said it was, he didnt live where he said he lived etc. but i didnt care,(He ended up telling me everything i wanted to know, his 'real name' etc) i was still in love with the guy as silly as it sounds because we talked everynight on the phone as silly teenagers do but this was like 9 hour conversations and didnt go a day without talking. i started skipping a few classes here and there just because i would be talking to him on the phone. and then i moved from high school to varsity where i had to move towns; i then found out that he once again had lied about everything, by this time we were really into eachother, telling eachother we loved eachother, sending eachother gifts etc. i found this all out because we agree'd to meeet, i had bought bus tickets and everything and he cancelled on me, of course it all crushed me, how could i believe so much i meant something to him just because he meant everything to me?. i once again forgave him because im sow eak for the boy, and then he told me all the REAL TRUTHS, which i know for a fact are the truths because other people have confirmed the for me (his relations). I Wanted to leave so badly, just let him go and be free of his crap but i couldnt do it plus he asked me to stay, i wanted to be with him, have the title of 'his girlfriend' but he said he wasnt ready to settle down because i found out he was 2 years younger then me (which i didnt mind) so i accepted that. but about a week ago i was on bebo which ya'll may have heard of and i found out through his mates profile that he has a girlfriend, he has been with her for about 8 months, i cant even begin to explain how much this hurt me, i was so suicidal just because i feel like he`s all i have. my fathers a rugby league coach and has 8 rugby league boys living with us so his life revolves around that and my little brother, being the girl is definatly a downfall. and 'this guy' had been there for me through these times when i needed someone to talk to, can you imagine talking for hours on end on the phone? it really shows someone who you are, he knows me more then anyone. and yet i dont know him at all. i dont know what to do?. im trying so hard to get through it, but its killing me inside, i keep trying to tell myself 'come on your better then him' but im in love with him, i dont look at guys the same anymore because i dont want anyone but him, i even have a guy here who is in love with me and has wiped my tears everytime i cry over this subject but i cant love him back because my hearts with 'this guy'! when i found out about his gf he said he would break up with her for me, and we were supposed to meet because i found out he actually lives close to me, but the night we were going to meet he backed out, got scared, he`s seen photos of me and im a rather beautiful girl so he got scared saying 'im too good for him', and he thinks we arent a match just because we have different lifestyles, im at varsity striving for a good future whilst he is a gang member. another thing that shows me im so in love with him is this, he is right, i am too good for him, he`s not great looking and isnt a good person yet i am, ive always been there for him, dropping anything ive been doing to help him out.
awwww man im so crushed. i dont know what to do?



Posts: 3 | From: NZ | Registered: Apr 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 28700

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Namida     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
You are too good for him...

As in he's lied to you so many times he doesn't deserve you. He's lied to you 3(?) times about his identity and he told you he loved you while he also said it to another, I would cut your losses here and start your love life anew, without him.

A friend of mine was after this one guy for 5 years, she'd not take other guys seriously while waiting for him, while he'd date any girl who came along. So early this year they finally got together after 5 years. 3 months in he cheats on her then leaves her and joins the army.

He wasn't worth the wait, you're better off without him.

And still the beds are burning, burning in our sleep.
Take me away from everything I see.

Posts: 66 | From: Australia | Registered: May 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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