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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Confused

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Author Topic: Confused
Member # 40096

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So, I have found / put myself in this situation that I'm not sure how to deal with. I am crazy about this guy I work with, but he is getting married this month, when I don't know. But last week, after a work party, after some time of flirting, we ended up not having sex, but getting naked and pleasuring eachother in his car. The weird thing is that although I know that part of me should feel bad, I don't really, I just like him so much. And when I brought up his girlfriend, he said "that was before I met you" and now at work we are kissing and making out when no one is around and sneaking around and stuff. I'm 21 next month, and he is older then I am, but I'm torn between wanting him to be with me and us building something, and thinking that this has to stop, but when I see him I can't stop smiling and my heart goes funny. And today I guess this girl I work with some him like touching my face or something and asked me what was happening between us, and naturally I lied, but now I am consumed with the idea that she is going to tell people and that I'm going to loose him. I'm totally torn up about this, about being happy and doing what's right, what should I do?
Posts: 1 | From: Home | Registered: Sep 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Member # 17924

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You should stop this. Now.

Seriously, gal, this guy about to be a married man. Regardless of what he wants, you obviously know better. This needs to end, and soon.

And you know, really, if the woman who saw you two does say something, you could lose a heck of a lot more than a guy who you really shouldn't have gotten involved with in the first place. Like your job. Sneaking around and having any sort of sex in a business setting is a bad, bad idea, and could very easily get you both fired.

There are plenty of people out there who aren't about to get married. Whether he stays with his fiancee is his business, but you need to get out of there now.

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Posts: 3987 | From: Greater Burlington Area, Vermont | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Blue Koi
Member # 39785

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There can be a lot of problems that arise from this situation. Perhaps it is easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment, but ask yourself a few questions. Where do you see this relationship going? Has he broken ties with his fiancee already? And if you really think that your relationship would work, think about if he can do this to someone he is about to marry, is it very possible that he may one day do this to you? You deserve someone who will treat you with respect. A good indicator of a someone who will respect you is someone who respects others as well.

"Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions."

Posts: 171 | From: USA/CHINA | Registered: Aug 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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