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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » I don't know how to talk to girls

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Author Topic: I don't know how to talk to girls
Member # 39019

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Hey umm, lately I've been feeling kinda lonely and I want to get a girlfriend but I really don't know what to do. Every time i see them they are in a big group talking about something (I don't know if they are talking about how ugly am am or something). And the few times when I get to talk to them I say hi and they say hi and then I don't know what to say. They only thing I could find was some sites that said I had to do some sort of 45 degree handshake, but I don't think this would work. Please help! Thanks!
Posts: 1 | From: flo rida | Registered: Jun 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Firstly, I don't think that, if you're feeling lonely, a relationship is a good way to remedy that. And it'd be especially hard to jump into that if you have very little social contact. So why don't you take it slow? Start by widening your circle of friends and meeting new people. You can do that by taking up a new hobby, joining a club at your school, joining a sports team, volunteering, etc. Lots of possibilities there.

Second, there is no one way to talk to all girls. Girls are individuals, not some distant, homogeneous race. So what you'll want to do is start being more open and confident (for starters, ditch the idea that they're talking about you behind your back - chances are they're not!) in general. And just talk. You don't need to have deep conversations right off, just start with simple things to get to know someone, and it'll naturally progress from there.

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"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 39022

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What you should do when you talk to a girl is just be honest and don't try too hard. If you're at a party, start off by saying Hi, my name's whatevre, what's yours?

Then ask the girl about where she's from, what she's into, talk to her about whatever is happening around you. One oft he easiest methods to get to know someone is talking on the phone or by IM because some of the shyness goes away. My boyfriend and I have been together for more than 2 years now. We met via a mutual friend, who introduced us to each other at a get together. We started calling each other, emailing each other, and hanging out, and it came naturally because we started off as friends, and it's like they say, you can't have a good love without a good friendship, so if you want a girl to like you and get a girlfriend, be honest and treat her like a person, and don't be shy, but don't be too cocky either. Just act like you would act with your friends (but with a little less burping and farting, ya know?) and take it slow.

Posts: 8 | From: MI | Registered: Jun 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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