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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » How do you take compliments?

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Author Topic: How do you take compliments?
Member # 35336

Icon 1 posted      Profile for hs123     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
So I have a great boyfriend, but I'm awful at taking compliments, completely awkward... a total moment killer...
Earlier he was like, "I'm so comfortable around you. Any other time I've been with someone and I'm naked it's awkward, but with you it's really nice and I don't feel weird and I feel so comfortable with you"
And I was just like "YOU"RE EMBARASSING ME!!!!!!!" Just squirming on the other end of the phone, literally. But he knows I'm awkward, so it wasn't unexpected I guess, but I would have liked for it to have been a nicer moment between us in retrospect. I guess I'm much better with words when I'm not actually speaking.

SO, How do YOU take compliments like that? Because I know I always feel awkward. And I keep trying to think what I would have said differently, but I can't really think of anything because I think that's just my personality- to get embarassed like that because I'm soooo introverted---- at least he knows it....

But what would you have said in that sort of situation... ?

What situations have you been in similar to that?

Posts: 401 | From: USA | Registered: Sep 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 29978

Icon 1 posted      Profile for echomikeromeo     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I can sympathize about feeling awkward when people compliment me. However, what I've learned is to keep in mind that all the other person wants to do is be nice - a simple "thank you" response helps the other person understand that you do appreciate their kind thought.

There's nothing like communication: you can always talk to your boyfriend and explain to him how you feel, and if there are ways he could "tone down" his complimenting.

Posts: 29 | From: UK | Registered: Jul 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 38279

Icon 1 posted      Profile for lozzy57     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I have the same sorta problem, when my boyfriend compliments me, or anyone else for that matter, I always say something really horrible like 'don't lie' or 'don't be silly', even when I know they're being serious.

My boyfriend and I had a big long chat about it a few weeks ago though, and he said it really hurt him that I thought so little of myself that I could accuse him of lying when he told me i was beautiful (or whatever).

Recently I've been trying to just say 'thank you'. He still knows I don't agree with him, but it shows that I've realised he's being nice, and so that kinda works for us.

Why don't you try talking to your boyfriend and see how he feels about it all?

Chin up darling - knock yourself out!

Posts: 26 | From: London, UK | Registered: May 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 35336

Icon 1 posted      Profile for hs123     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I should add that I emailed my boyfriend after- he really wasn't offended at all- things like this seem to happen all the time between us- and we usually end up emailing because I'm so awful at saying what I want to say but I can email it in a second without causing any trouble.

He doesn't really get offended easily, and he's very forgiving anyhow- I just know that I'm kindof a moment killer. Like, what he said was really nice but I really just went and killed it because I'm so awkwarded out by myself.
Like, when I say thanks, it's not even just a simple
it'll be
like, i can make the awkward situation even more awkward by the inflection of my voice.

Posts: 401 | From: USA | Registered: Sep 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 37570

Icon 1 posted      Profile for BrittyKitty     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I'm horrible at taking compliments.
I simply refuse to accept them.
I drive my boyfriend, friends and family up the wall.


I just don't know how to accept them. I either shrug them off, or disagree.

Posts: 7 | From: Canada | Registered: Mar 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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