Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
  New Poll  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » thoughts on "taking a break"?

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: thoughts on "taking a break"?
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 22756

Icon 5 posted      Profile for kitka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Anybody like to offer their experiences on taking a break from a relationship...?

My boyfriend's life has turned upside-down, so we agreed to take a break until he can fix things and then hopefully have the good relationship that we both deserve.

Posts: 455 | From: New York, NY | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 10 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Situations like this always vary, usually depending on how much of your own life you sustained while you were together.

In other words, if you sustained a lot of your own life, your other relationships with friends and family, while you may miss a partner, it really isn't that hard. You generally get more time than you've had, for instance, to focus on your own goals and hobbies. You generally get to reassess things with the space given per what YOU need as well. Just because he asked for the break doesn't mean it can't have use for both of you.

From the sound of your other post, you sound pretty well-adjusted. I imagine you'll handle this just fine.

(Btw, in your other post, you asked if you should call your partner, and my answer to that would be that it depended on what you agreed on when you started the break. But generally, it's best to leave that ball in the court of who asked for a break.)

One thing just to be aware of. While young adult relationships tend to have a greater velocity than adult relationships, i the general arena, most relationship counselors consider relationships before six months to still be in a courting period. So, it's possible that this relationship may NOT pan out to continue romantically, or become more serious afterwards, especially given that within a few months, your partner dealt with a major crisis in his own life. So, for your own emotional health, it might be sage to just be prepared for this NOT ending up turning out to result in the relationship you envision. Absolutely, it still could, but being prepared for other possibilities is also smart.

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 22756

Icon 10 posted      Profile for kitka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thank you for your advice, Miz Scarlet.

I knew that the relationship would probably end when he graduated from college; it's just ending earlier than I thought it would.

Posts: 455 | From: New York, NY | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

  New Poll   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:

Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3