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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Can I live up to what he was to her?

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Author Topic: Can I live up to what he was to her?
Member # 19107

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I just started going out with this girl a couple weeks ago. Her last boyfriend she was with for 9.5 months. He didnt always treat her right and at the end of August, he cheated on her. Of course in more than 9 months, he said things that she would believe (I'll always be there for you, I'll love you forever, You mean to most to me...). I just get the feeling sometimes that I will never live up to what he meant to her. He was her first and he meant a lot to her.

He still to this day can make her cry by saying little things. She is over him, but still cares what he thinks.

Also, what can I do to make her understand that I will never cheat on her and I wont be an idiot like he was to her?


Posts: 124 | From: USA | Registered: Jul 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 94

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Well, you can start by telling her that, regularly if need be.

It sounds like you respect your partner very much, which is a great start. Feelings don't spring up overnight, however-- they grow as relationships grow. Don't stress about comparing yourself to your partner's ex, just concentrate on being the best partner that you can be.

It sounds like your partner's ex was an emotionally abusive person, and in that respect your relationship with her will hopefully never be the same as her relationship with her partner. Of course I can't give any guarantees as to the success of a relationship, but if both of you do continue to want to be together for long enough, and you both respect each other as people, then you will doubtlessly end up with a much stronger and more loving relationship than your partner had with her ex.

Posts: 2710 | From: Australia | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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