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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » my dreamgurl broke up with her bf..what do i do???

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Author Topic: my dreamgurl broke up with her bf..what do i do???
flashme18
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Member # 15943

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k..little background first...i met my dreamgurl bout a year and a half ago..we met on aol and used to just chat latenight when we got home drunk or whatever...finally we wound up meeting..she came over one night at like 5 am and i was expecting to hook up with her even though she had a bf...we talked for a bit then she said "i'll kick u in the nuts if u try anything"..so we slept in my bed..i didnt try anything of course and we just stayed in touch online for bout another year..after that night i met her i had the biggest crush on her..cuz im a sucker for beatiful girls...like i didnt change my pillowcases for a while cuz i could smell her perfume on it....anyways..i wound up moving bout 5 minutes from her in january..so she took me and my roomate out and showed us the area and the bars..got us wasted..and i wound up taking a punch in the eye from some dude tryin to hit on her later that night..lol..whole other story there...anyways...so i wound up hookin up with this girl she introduced me to and didnt really chill with her for bout another month..then we started chillin all the time...in february when i was just startin to date my last gf...me and the dreamgurl were partying at my place and i walked her down to her car and was sittin in it talkin to her and she leaned in to kiss me..and i turned to the side to make sure she only kissed me on the cheek...so after that nite we talked bout how we would be great together etc, but cant do anything cuz she has a bf...and she called me her crush for a bit...i told her then that if she ever broke up i dont want to be a rebound cuz i care bout her and dont want to get hurt....so while i was goin out with my last girl..she was jealous of her sometimes, etc...so i knew she had some sorta feelings for me...whenever she comes over she would leave me these cute notes with hearts on them...i didnt think too much of that...oh yeah.the first nite we met..she wound up forgettin her watch at my place..so i assumed she did it on purpose..but she just forgot it...she always asked me to give it to her but i would forget..last month she finally found it in my closet and was supposed to take it back..i was like now i have nothing to make me think of u..cuz it used to beep like every hour...when she left my apt...i found the watch and a note on my bed sayin that i should keep the watch so we have a reason to see each other..with like 6 hearts in the note...sorry this is so long..so anyways..2 weeks ago i was on a date and she called me sayin she broke up with her bf..i was in shock..and didnt really think anything of it til last week i was talkin to a girl bout her and the fact that i wasnt sure bout some of her comments lately..if she was hinting to me that she wants me to pursue her..cuz she would say things like "uh oh..here comes the compliments"..and i hope i didnt scare u off with" referring to a wild weekend me, her, and some friends had last weekend partying...well the girl helped me figure out i have strong feelins for her..so i was supposed to tell her this the next time i saw her..well she wound up callin me that night and invited me to come out and party with her..so i was all nervous cuz i wasnt sure how she would react..she is all confused bout her bf and her living situation..all stressed out...so we wind up goin back to my place with her and a friend of hers and he passes out on the couch and we get ready to crash in my bed...so we are cuddlin..and then she goes to kiss me and of course i dont hold back this time...so we wind up kissin for a bit..little tongue, mostly lips and lots and lots of holdin hands and cuddlin...sidenote..she was wasted!!..i was just drunk..so i never did tell her how i felt bout her cuz we started hoookin up first...then she had to go to work in the morning and i didnt get the chance to tell her then...i saw her at her work but she was too busy and too many people were around to have the conversation i wanted...she called me that nite and then dissappeared...she's been drinkin away her sorrows since she broke up..so she's wasted like every nite...fri nite she calls me and says shes goin to a party but will be back in town later that night..so i say lets meet up and she agrees..thats the last i heard from her til tonight she called me cryin bout her bf and her life...drunk again..and i dont want to say how i feel over the phone..tomorrow she is goin away for a week i think...i dont know what to think..or what to say..i dont want to scare her off...however..we used to talk bout us bein together few months back after she tried to kiss me and i denied her...wondering what u ladies think bout this situation..cuz im dyin to talk to her and tell her how i feel..i need to know if that night meant anything to her..sorry this is so long..im sure i forgot some stuff..but i can fill that in later if anyone is interested...
Posts: 26 | Registered: Dec 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 568

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i have a really short attention span. i cannot read your post and process it. please hit the EDIT button (it's the one with the pencil right above the body of your message) and break this post into smaller paragraphs.

i'm not the only one who can't read you, and by using paragraph breaks and proper punctuations to make smaller snetences, you will make your question a LOT easier for everyone to read. you will get more responses this way.

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Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Londongirl
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Member # 18235

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Sounds to me like this will continue to torture you until you talk to her or decide to give up. You seem to be going over and over this in your post, agonising about it.

You have feelings for someone who is confused, maybe she won't be able to sort out her feelings now, so I would be cautious as it seems like you could really get hurt here.

But you're not telepathic and none of the rest of us can predict the future for you, so it seems to me that the bottom line is that you're going to have to ask her if you want to know how she's feeling.

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Londongirl
University Student


Posts: 352 | From: UK | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Olive
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Well since I'm kind of the girl in this situation.... I just broke up with my boyfriend. I have a guy friend i've known for almost 3 years. I was nuts about him. Then we started working together and I thought I started liking him again. My feelings got so confused so I broke up with my boyfriend...and for other reasons. I was hanging out with my friend last night and we were cuddling, holding hands and stuff like that. I could tell he wanted to kiss me but I turned away.

My emotions are very messed up right now and I dont know what I want. I love my boyfriend. I like my friend. I don't know who I am. I cannot hook up with my friend knowing I still have very intense feelings for my ex. I still feel like i'm still with him.

So this is my advice. If you feel the time is right to tell your friend your feelings now, do so. But I'm sure she is still really confused and hurting inside, she is not ready for another relatinship right away. Just stick close and show support. She'll respect you for being there and not trying to rush her. And you'll be happy you didn't try to rush her because it will not break the ties between you.


Posts: 338 | From: Livermore, CA | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
dreamchic72
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Member # 18107

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Whatever you do DON'T rush her. My boyfriend of a year and a half and I recently broke up and I have hooked up with some guys but still have feelings for my ex. It depends on how they broke up, how she felt about him, etc. But chances are, if she's calling you crying about her ex then she's still into him.

Stick around as a friend and give her time to heal. She will definitely thank you for it and if its meant to be it will be, if not you'll still have a close friendship.


Posts: 55 | From: Orlando, FL, USA | Registered: May 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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