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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » boyfriends and vibrators

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Author Topic: boyfriends and vibrators
Member # 8914

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I searched around a little bit and I didn't find anything but if there is another thread, please point me in that direction.
My boyfriend and I were disscussing vibrators a little while ago and I mentioned I wouldn't mind having one "for those times when he wasn't around" and he seemed all offended and intimidated. He's scared that it'll replace him. I tried and tried to explain it to him ,but he doesn't understand that a girl doesn't just get turned on when her boyfriend is in the room.
Does anyone else know of anyone with similar fears/feelings? Or does anyone have any advice as to how I can clear my honey's fears up?


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Executive Director & Founder
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How about you simply ask him how many of his male friends (including him) with grilfriends don't masturbate?

Sounds like he just needs to realize that men and women really aren't that different, and that partnered sex and masturbation aren't the same thing: not for men, not for women.

And you know, lots of couples use sex toys when everyone is present, too. Might be worth pointing out.

Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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He's scared that it'll replace him.

It can be worth pointing out that it's not a replacement for him, it's a replacement for your hand.

Or you can point out that vibrators can't kiss or cuddle, and they're lousy conversationalists .

Sex toys and human beings are two different categories, and the one can't replace the other (although they can sometimes go very nicely together ...)

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Member # 12779

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My Boyfriend really wants me to get one, he sees it as a bit of a turn on, and he says it'll give him a break! the cheek!

Why is it that the person that makes you cry, is the only one who can make you stop.

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Gumdrop Girl
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Amber, my guy was the same way. Last year, he got me a sex toy. It caught me off guard because I had been hinting that I wanted tickets to go see Beck, and lemme tell ya, that was no pair of Beck tickets. But it rang his bells, I guess, and it's nice that he's not intimidated by such things, although I wished he'd have listened to me when i was making my demands.

mundi faece repletum

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Member # 13723

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My boyfriend felt the same way about having a vibrator, but he realized simply that he is not always around, and that we do have those times that we need something extra. Also another thing is he likes to take control, by using it on me.

[No need to quote the entire post -- New to Scarleteen? gives a brief explanation of how the board works. -ook]

[This message has been edited by ookuotoe (edited 06-30-2003).]

Posts: 5 | From: Cleburne,TX,USA | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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