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Author Topic: any advice?
Tonyssmgluva
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I am 16 n i am a tomboy but i never have a problem wit gettin guys at all . well my mom thinks that my wardrobe makes me look like a lesbian and she always asks me if i'm a lesbian like it's a bad thing . i'm not but i have friends that are how can i get her to realize that being a lesbian isn't all that bad. also she doesn't trust me around guys either because she always thinks i'm pregnant any advice ?

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i'm here for ya cause i'd want you to be here for me


Posts: 8 | From: Beltsville, Md,USA | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
foreveryoung
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My mom has somthing against being a lesbian also. Is your mom a really religious person?
Explain to her that just because you don't dress like a lot of other people doesn't mean your a bad person, or that your a lesbian. It just says that you like that style and your unique Oh and i got my mom to meet one of my friends, and she likes the person that she met, she just doesn't like the fact that she's a lesbian. So maybe you can get your mom to meet one of your friends. It might work.

good luck, i hope everything works out ok

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*****@nna-Christine*****

[This message has been edited by foreveryoung (edited 05-23-2002).]


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noob88
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I think that your mother is being pretty unfair to be so judgemental of her own daughter, unless you've done something that would make her be so.

But I think it would help to tell her what you think of lesbians and what you are, as far as sexual orientation goes.

By the way this might be better in the GBLT area maybe an advocate can move it.

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-MONTY-

If you find you love someone more than you love yourself, I hope that person feels the same way.

"We may be through with the past but the past aint through with us"

"As far as I am concerned humans have not come up with a belief that is worth believing"


Posts: 104 | From: Tiburon, Ca | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Jill
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I think this thread is just fine where it is.

It seems to be time to sit down and talk to your mother. It sounds like she doesn't really understand your actions and is worried. From what you've told us there is no real reason for her to feel this way so I'm sure a little reasurance will go a long way.

As far as your mother's feelings about homosexuality go, you can't change those overnight. However, telling her how her comments affect you may prompt her to be more considerate. Letting her get to know your friends may also help the situation.

Good luck.


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Lady Moonlight
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I just had to laugh at the irony here. Have you tried explaining to your mom that she needs to pick a worry and stick with it? After all, if you're a lesbian, she doesn't need to worry about you getting pregnant, and if you're in danger of getting pregnant (i.e. having heterosexual intercourse), you're probably not a lesbian!!

On the serious side, I think ookuotoe gave some really good advice there. Sit down and talk with your mom. You may not change her mind on everything (in fact, the chances of that are quite slim), but just opening the lines of communication is a very good thing.


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Tonyssmgluva
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thanx guyz i'm gonna have a talk with her tonight hope all goez well if not then i tried .
Posts: 8 | From: Beltsville, Md,USA | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Sun Wu
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quote:
Originally posted by Lady Moonlight:
I just had to laugh at the irony here. Have you tried explaining to your mom that she needs to pick a worry and stick with it? After all, if you're a lesbian, she doesn't need to worry about you getting pregnant, and if you're in danger of getting pregnant (i.e. having heterosexual intercourse), you're probably not a lesbian!!


I totally agree. And with the rest, I recomend talking to your mom. You will not be able to change her mind... But you need to get some facts straight with her. IT's totally unfair to accuse you of being a lesbian because of how you dress, but at the same time be paranoid any time you hang out with a guy.


Posts: 117 | From: Where does my name remind you of? well it's wrong! | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Moth
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::can't help but chuckle:: I have almost EXACTLY the same problem. I dress like a guy most of the time (ironically, at the moment I'm wearing a form-fitting v-neck, but never mind), and my mom complains that it makes me look unattractive, and at the same time she worries that I'm having sex.

mm, talk to your mom and explain that you just like to dress like that, it's comfortable and you like the way it looks, and you're not a lesbian (since you're talking about getting guys I assume you're not!), and that you'll be very careful to not get pregnant.

That's pretty much what I did with my mom- the first bit, at least. Worked for me. Hope it works the same for you.


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Tonyssmgluva
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i talked to my mom recently about my appearance n she thinks that i still come across as a lesbian n that i need to change my appearance but i dont wanna .... n i told her that under no circumstances am i havin sex but she still manages to think that i am pregnant everytime i get a stomach ache n then we end up arguin about it any more advice?

Posts: 8 | From: Beltsville, Md,USA | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
celery
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Tell your mom to make up her mind, are you a lesbian, or are you pregnant?
Posts: 1000 | From: Canada | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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