posted
Quick question~ Me and my boyfriend (3 months) are planning on taking a break this summer so that we can both be independent, spend more time with our friends and in general just have more fun. I love him to pieces, and don't want to break up with him....so I'm wondering if anyone has taken a sucsessful break and has any words of advice!! I need all the help I can get so that I can have fun and keep him in my life...suggestions please!
Posts: 32 | From: Sacremento, CA, USA | Registered: Feb 2001
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posted
if you guys just want to take a break for the moment... i think that it is fine. ask yourself... do you still want to continue this relationship after the break, i know that you would but you would have to have a discussion with your partner whether he wants to continue with it or not.
it is hard to tell because you may not know at all of what he is thinking. try and have a talk about it and see whether he gives you the answers you want to hear.
posted
Well, the way I figure...we're young and there's no point being tied down. Plus, if we spend the whole summer together we'll inevitably get sick of eachother Posts: 32 | From: Sacremento, CA, USA | Registered: Feb 2001
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posted
You know hon, if I could be blunt, it doesn't sound like you want a relationship.
You might like the trappings that come with a relationship like having someone to hold and call baby but you don't really want to be in a relationship.
If you are going to be sick of each other after one summer, what's going to happen in the future if there is one? And spending one summer means being tied down? I think agreeing to be his gf means that you have been 'tied down' so to speak.
In every relationship, there is a certain amount of responsibility and I don't think you want that as of now.
I think the both of you should stay friends, get to know each other and other people better and when you are really ready for a relationship, start it again. Have all the fun you want now. But really, having fun isn't exclusive to singles only you know? You can be attached and have fun as well.
posted
Hmm... I think i have to agree w/ Lin here.
If you think taking a break will help, maybe you're not ready for such a commitment anyway. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. Maybe having a steady bf just isn't what you want right now ... or you have higher priorities. Whatever the case, you have to do what's best for you. While you're doing that though, don't drag him along for the ride.
If things aren't going the best, taking a break isn't usually the best answer. That's just putting the problems away for later (they never go away on their own!) and that's not good either. Talk it through. Be honest w/ yourself, at least.
------------------ When mom found my diaphram, I told her it was a bathing cap for my cat. ~ Liz Winston
posted
PinupGirl, what does your boyfriend think of all this?
There are several factors to consider before you make a choice like this, but I'll wait on your reply before I explain why I have such a visceral reaction to it.
[This message has been edited by BruinDan (edited 09-25-2002).]
quote:Originally posted by PinupGirl: Well, the way I figure...we're young and there's no point being tied down. Plus, if we spend the whole summer together we'll inevitably get sick of eachother
Maybe I'm wrong, but in my opinion, a healthy relationship won't "tie you down." You also seem so sure you'll get sick of each other. Who says? Maybe you'll learn something new about your b/f that you didn't know before. Maybe you're just trying to aviod comttment. Talk to him about it.
Posts: 286 | From: Ames, IA | Registered: Jan 2001
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