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Author Topic: Help
twilight808
Neophyte
Member # 40650

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i need help. me and my bf were playing around. and he had a condom on. what happened was his penis was playing with my clit and i THOUGHT he had the condom on. next thing i know, its gone. i have no idea how long it was gone for but it wasn't there when i checked. his penis didn't go in, but just the fact that the condom slid off has got me scared. could i get pregnant from this? what are my chances? and is EC even a consideration in this situation?
Posts: 11 | From: Hawaii | Registered: Oct 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Johann7
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There is a very low chance that you could become pregnant from not-penetrative genital-genital contact. You don't say whether your boyfriend ejaculated on your vulva, but I'll assume he didn't since you don't mention it, and it seems from the tone of your post that you stopped the sexual activity once you realized the condom was gone.

Prior to ejaculation, the Cowper's glands secrete a fluid (commonly called precum) that lubricates the male urethra and helps neutralize acidity from urine. While this fluid may contain trace amounts of sperm, the chance of pregnancy, particularly from non-penetrative "outercourse", is extremely low, since the Cowper's glands secretion can do little to neutralize the acidity of the vagina. Even if you boyfriend did ejaculate, the chances of pregnancy from non-penetrative contact are very low (I'd put them at less than 1%, though I don't have any real figures - maybe someone who does could post).

As for whether EC is appropriate, I can't speak to that since I don't have statistics on the occurrence or severity of side-effects, but my guess would be no given the low chance of pregnancy.

One other consideration is possible transmission of STIs, but as sexually active persons, you and your boyfriend should be getting regular screenings anyways. :-) And good job on the condom use; it's the smart thing to do.

A final note: since pregnancy is a concern for you, you need to have a talk with the boyfriend about what happens when the condom slips off (and to make sure he didn't intentionally remove it), i.e. the sex STOPS and the condom is put back on. If your boyfriend has frequent problems with condoms falling off or breaking he should consider switching to a different size/type/brand that works better. In addition to condom use for STI and pregnancy prevention, you might also consider hormonal birth control - check your local Planned Parenthood for info.

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Robble Robble Robble!

Posts: 46 | From: Milwaukee, WI USA | Registered: Jul 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
twilight808
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Thank you so much. My worries just dropped! But both me and my boyfriend have taken this seriously. No, he did not ejaculate (thank goodness). I was just worried about the pre-cum because I know that there can be some active sperm. My boyfriend did urinate before. Also, after I realized the condom was gone, I got up and went to the shower to get cleaned off and I also urinated. Was this the right thing to do? Or did showering increase my chances? I washed it with soap (I think I learned that sperm can be killed when washing it with soap)
Posts: 11 | From: Hawaii | Registered: Oct 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
twilight808
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oh, I also forgot. When engaging in foreplay, I think it was pretty close to the opening on my vagina. And I was pretty wet. Could I still be pregnant if the juices mix?
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Stephanie_1
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Johann: This area is for volunteer and starr replies only, See you on the rest of the boards [Smile]

Twilight: From out pregnancy risk assessment for dry sex, Dry sex without vaginal entry but direst genital to genital contact poses a moderate risk of pregnancy, because there's no way of knowing if his pre-ejaculate contained sperm or not. If it's been less than 120 hours then you can obtain EC to lower the risk. Also, you both did have an STI risk with this, so if you're not up to date with your tests you'll want to do that.

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

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twilight808
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Even if it wasn't actually put in?
Posts: 11 | From: Hawaii | Registered: Oct 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
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Yes, because there's no way of knowing if his pre-ejaculate contained any sperm. Of course whether or not you choose to use EC is your decision, and really depends on how much of a risk you're comfortable with. Here's the link to our Pregnancy Risk Assessment: Dry Sex article, and you want to see the last listing for direct genital-to-genital contact. Anytime you're having direct genital to genital contact you want use some type of reliable birth control, including condoms if you've not been in a monogamous relationship for six months with two full clear STI screenings.

[ 03-08-2009, 02:56 PM: Message edited by: Stephanie_1 ]

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

Posts: 3429 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
twilight808
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so even showering directly after finding out the condom was off wouldn't decrease my chances? i'm not positive of his precum went in me, but I do know most of it was on the outside because his penis was just rubbing up against my clit
Posts: 11 | From: Hawaii | Registered: Oct 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
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We really can't tell you with 100% certainty how high the risk may have been, whether or not there was any sperm in his pre-ejaculate, whether or not any may have gone into your vagina, or even for sure how long there was no condom on during contact. What we can tell you is that there was a some risk, and the best was to reduce that risk is by using EC.

[ 03-08-2009, 03:10 PM: Message edited by: Stephanie_1 ]

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

Posts: 3429 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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