posted
Hey guys. You're familiar with my history, so I'll spare you the stories.
Maybe 15-20 minutes ago, I had a minor freak-out--panic, depression, all those goodies--but I managed to calm down after a few minutes (approx. 8). Usually it takes longer (up to hours, even), but that might have to do with whatever triggers these emotions. This time, it was body image.
Stupid, huh? I guess that's why my little "episode" didn't last so long. Plus I had a friend on AIM talking with me.
But I've been having these periodically over the past few months, and I made a decision to look for a therapist. The only problem is, I don't exactly know how to go about doing this. What I have been doing recently is going on my insurance plan's website and finding a list of psychologists/psychiatrists who accept our crappy insurance.
- Is there anything else I should look for? Specialties, qualifications, etc? - How do I go about making an appointment? Is there anything in particular I should mention?
Finally, there's the whole issue of my family. I can barely hold myself together when doctors talk about my health problems with my mother in front of me. It feels like when I was 12 and I shoplifted (long story there) and we all are sitting in the security office while I fill out paperwork and my mom just looks at me, wondering where she went wrong.
I can't exactly go behind her back to make these appointments, but we were told to look for a therapist in February and she has done nothing since.
Also, one other snafu. I'm going to college 8 hours away, so should I just wait until then and start therapy in my college town? A friend of mine mentioned that the 2-1/2 months I have before leaving isn't exactly enough time to build trust/a rapport.
(Though I've heard campus psych services leave something to be desired, they cost $20 after 6 visits, and my insurance only has one doctor in that entire area, plus I have NO transportation. I can't exactly arrive on campus and introduce myself like, "Hi, I'm Jane... could you give me a ride to therapy?" That'd kinda put a cramp in my social life, like a little sign: Emotional Baggage. Dependent. Do Not Feed.)
Oh, and I'd greatly prefer a female doctor. I just... can't be alone with men.
Thanks for any help you guys can provide.
- Origami Jane
Posts: 129 | From: Mid-Atlantic US | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
Per shopping for a therapist, you generally can often make first-time visits to interview them, to see if you are comfy with them, at no cost or a reduced cost.
So, you'll want to call, ask if they're taking new patients, ask if you can have a short app't just to see if you feel a match. In your case, I'd mention that you need lesbian-friendly therapy, that you have abuse issues, depression and anxiety. If I recall right, you have some self-mutilation history as well, in which case you'll want to mention that, too. You absolutely can only choose a female therapist.
Your mother should NOT go in with you to these "interviews." A good therapist would make that clear to her very benignly if that's an issue.
-------------------- Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen About Me • Get our book! Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Posts: 63699 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000
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posted
I think finding a therapist now is a good idea -- if nothing else, she can help you think about the transition to college. Since Heather's already given you advice in that area, I'll just give you advice about the school aspect.
What I would do when you get to school is to go to campus psych services and make an appointment. Most campuses do have limited access to certain services because of financial issues. However, they can do a few things:
1) provide you with information about and access to free or low cost counseling services in the community, including information about transportation
2) get you access to on-campus services that are less expensive or free (like group therapy instead of individual counseling; I can talk about how both of those worked on my campus if you'd like)
3) help you get access to free or low cost medical care if they want to rule out medical conditions or if medication could be helpful in treating your depression and anxiety.
So tap into their limited resources; that's part of what your tuition money is paying for. They know the community and they should be able to hook you up with additional resources if you need them.
Posts: 3077 | Registered: Sep 2000
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posted
Thank you both very much for your replies. Erin, if you could tell me about group and individual therapy, that would be great.
How do I tell my mom? Part of me just wants to hand her the date, time, and address of my appointment and tell her that she's driving me. At least that way, she doesn't really have the option of letting my need for help just "slip her mind."
I was also trying to match addresses with train stops so I could just walk to my appointments myself.
Also, how do I find a lesbian-friendly therapist, or ask if one I've found is lesbian-friendly?
Posts: 129 | From: Mid-Atlantic US | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
One more thing... would they ever bring in my mom to talk about medication or something (though I really want to try just talking first, just because I do not want to be dependent on some drug for the rest of my life)?
And if she ever asks what goes on in my sessions, should I just casually remind her that they are confidential?
Oh, and what should I talk about in the interview session? Just, "here's what's being going on and why I thought this would be a good idea..." ?
Posts: 129 | From: Mid-Atlantic US | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
I'm just gonna add to this thread because it's related.
Hokai. Busy day today, but I did get a list of names from my insurance provider, and I will call them on Monday or Tuesday, depending on when my mother will be out of the house. I could always call from my cell phone after school.
I have 34 names at three different locations.
Am I too old to go to the Children's Hosptial of Philadelphia?
There are also a bunch at the Hospital of UPENN. (Both of these locations are good because they are two blocks from a train station and I can get to my appointments myself. That's important. Less chance of awkward car rides to and from.)
Am I forgetting anything else? Would it be rude to ask how much it would cost for just an interview-y type thing?
Posts: 129 | From: Mid-Atlantic US | Registered: Feb 2006
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Individual therapy is when you see a counselor one-on-one (obviously); at most schools, since they only have a limited number of counselors, that's usually what gets limited in terms of visits.
Group therapy is when a group of people meet with one or two counselors and talk about their problems together. Sometimes it might be a group for people with specific issues (people with depression, people with eating disorders, people with a history of abuse); other times, it's just a group of people who are all working to change. The counselors most often act as moderators and also as enforcers of the group rules/safe space boundaries. I was in group therapy for several years, and I got a lot out of it, but it's not for everyone. Still, I'd encourage you to try it, if only for the "I'm not the only one here who has a lot of baggage" feeling that it might give you.
Counslors may do what's called an "intake interview" when they talk to you -- you may fill out a questionnaire and/or they might ask you questions about your family history, your moods, all those sorts of things. So if you're not sure what to say, they'll probably have some questions to help get you started.
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