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Author Topic: Moms driving me crazy!!!
Southrnbelle431
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OK. U prolly dont get questions like this but here goes anyway!! So I'm 17yrs old. A couple of months ago (Aug. '05) I started talkin to this guy (Nick). We were hooked up and sent on a blind date by two mutual friends. Well, he was 21 and when I told my mom she told me that she didnt have a problem with it. Well, we liked each other and we hung out for bout a month. Then I found out he was a liar and so I told him we needed to just be friends and not hang out anymore.

Well, the next month the two friends tried again. Sent me out again on another blind date with one of their friends. But I had known him previously. His name was Adam. He was also 21 and my mother didnt have a problem with that one either! Well, one nite he called me and told me that we just needed to be friends and that he was going to start seeing his EX again. Well, I was a little upset b/c I did really like him. Well I was determined to get answers. So, I got his bestfriends number (Donald) and called him. We talked for about 2 1/2 hours that night. He told me he'd call me in the morning to see how I was...

Well he did call me that morning. And the next and the next. It turned into we were talking everyday and seeing each other everyday and we weren't talkin bout Adam. Then the problem started...

Well, I hang out at the local Fire Dept b/c 95% of the people there I grew up with and I'm pretty good friends with. Some of them are like brothers to me. Well my real brother is in that fire dept and got jealous one nite b/c he seen that my truck was there. Well he called my mom and wined to her and got it so that I cant go back up there any more and her reason is b/c I'm too young to be hanging out up there with a bunch of twenty year olds.

Well, Donald is 21 also, and she is throwing a hissy fit. We've been talking and seeing each other in secret since Oct. '05. I was 16 at the time and I just turned 17 (Dec. 17) Well, when I ask her why I cant see him she just says "He's too old for you" and when I say "Well Nick and Adam were the same age, actually both of them were 3months older than Donald, and you didnt have a problem with them being 21" she just changes the subject and when I continue to ask her she continues to give me the same answer. Well, Donald has a very good reputation so it cant be because he has a bad reputation (b/c thats what mom bases all her decisions on when it comes to me dating sumbody) What Donald and I have decided to do now is just keep everything a secret till I'm 18 (which is NEXT December 17) and then tell her b/c once I'm 18 I'm legal and she cant stop me from being with him.

So my question is this, what would you do?? How would you handle this and what is the best way to handle this situation? I just dont understand why she wont give me a reason on why she doesnt want me with him other than "he's too old"

PLEASE HELP!!!


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Neve
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hun thats nothin' just ignor her it's not her decision to make. i'm only 14 and i hate my mom she yells and treats me like crap so just be glad your mom isn't like that and keep seeing donald

Posts: 3 | From: portsmouth,NH, US | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
JamsessionVT
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Neve, while we appreciate your input, you are not allowed to post here. The Ask Scarleteen forum and Emergencies forum are for staff and volunteers only.
Posts: 3987 | From: Greater Burlington Area, Vermont | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Southrnbelle431
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JamsessionVT do you have any advice for my post?
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LilBlueSmurf
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Your mother has given you a reason as to why she doesn't want you dating this guy ... It seems like a pretty clear reason to me. I don't know many parents that would be okay with their (barely) 17 year old daughter dating a 21 year old. I know my parents wouldn't have been okay w/ that.

While you're living in her house, she's the boss. She gets to decide who you see and who you date. Hiding this from your parents is a bad idea. They will find out. Parents always find out ... And you have a YEAR until you're 18. Do you really think you can hide this for a whole year? What do you think your parents will do when they find out?

I think it's sad that you're sacrificing your relationship with your parents for a guy that you've been with for such a short amount of time.


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Southrnbelle431
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quote:
Originally posted by LilBlueSmurf:
Your mother has given you a reason as to why she doesn't want you dating this guy ... It seems like a pretty clear reason to me. I don't know many parents that would be okay with their (barely) 17 year old daughter dating a 21 year old. I know my parents wouldn't have been okay w/ that.

Well I dont see how she can say that she has a problem with this one when the two guys I've dated before this one WERE 21 and she didnt have a problem with them! I think shes being a hypocrit! And the thing is when I dated those other guys i was 16.


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LilBlueSmurf
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So she's a hypocrit. Again, she's the boss. Living under her roof, you play by her rules.

I still think hiding this is a bad idea. I still think they will find out, and if your parents are anything like mine, you'll be lucky if you ever date again.

There may be difference between this 21 year old and the others. Your mother may have seen a change in your behaviour when you were dating the others that she didn't like. I don't really know ... And i don't really know what to tell you, other than to warn you again that you're playing with fire here.


Posts: 7168 | From: Ontario | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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