Just so you know, we can't give sexual technique--it's prohibited in our guidelines.
First of all, using latex gloves with a water based lube (available at the drugstore) will protect her from scratches from your hands, as well as offer protection against STDs. As for what to do, talking to your partner is a really good idea--you could say something like "I really don't know what to do to make you feel good, could you help me out?" Everyone likes different things so by communicating with your partner, you can find out what works best.
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Kindness and honesty can be expected only from the strong.