Donate Now
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » I've decided to finally stop

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: I've decided to finally stop
tbelle
Activist
Member # 32076

Icon 1 posted      Profile for tbelle     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I have decided that I will never have irresponsible sex ever again. And I'm going to stop dating for a while.

I've been putting myself at risk WAY too much and all I do is worry myself sick.

My period is due in two weeks but I have PMS symptoms. I don't know why this is but it's making me worried. It could be that my period will come early.

My partner and I fooled around twice in the past week and a half...and he used a condom. I don't know what to do to calm myself down. I keep trying to remember if there was any pregnancy risk involved in what we did but for some reason my mind is having trouble remembering.

Posts: 107 | From: New England | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 36725

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Stephanie_1     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
If you used a condom correctly for all contact, and it didn't break or slip off then the risk of pregnancy is really pretty low. Would you like to talk about some of these risks or your feelings per all this?

--------------------
"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

Posts: 3417 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tbelle
Activist
Member # 32076

Icon 1 posted      Profile for tbelle     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Within the past two weeks or maybe three weeks (sometime after my period ended), we were "spooning" naked. He sort of rubbed his penis between my butt, and that must have just been pre-cum. Then he put a condom on and put his penis inside my vagina. We were experimenting with penetration. He came inside my vagina *with* the condom still on. Then he took it off and threw it away. At that point he got hard again but we didn't have another condom. We spooned again and he came near my vagina but he was behind me (it was mostly near my butt). I held his penis to make sure that it didn't actually touch the entrance to my vagina. I just wiped it off my skin, and I think I showered after.

Two days ago, he put the condom on right away and he inserted his penis inside me, then he came and took it off. His penis didn't touch me without the condom on, I don't think.

I realize that there IS a risk but is it a very high risk? What should I do???

I'm sorry if I'm panicky. I was not that concerned right after these events, so I don't know why I'm panicking now. But I'm really confused as to why I feel PMS symptoms this early.

[ 01-24-2011, 08:29 PM: Message edited by: tbelle ]

Posts: 107 | From: New England | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tbelle
Activist
Member # 32076

Icon 1 posted      Profile for tbelle     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I am terrified...any response would be appreciated
Posts: 107 | From: New England | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
OWL Dan
Activist
Member # 49077

Icon 7 posted      Profile for OWL Dan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I do not see any risks with what you have described. It is possible that your period may be early this time. Periods can be irregular for many natural reasons; some of the more common reasons are stress (positive as well as negative stressors) and illnesses.

It sounds like taking a break or stepping back for a while from sexual activity might be a good idea if you feel you are having “irresponsible sex”. Feelings like this are a good sign that it is time to do a little soul searching to figure things out, in this case it is re-determining what responsible sex means to you ; not only on the physical aspects but on the emotional parts too. [Smile]

Let us know if there is anything we can do to help you with this.

--------------------
Dan

Posts: 842 | From: Ohio | Registered: Sep 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tbelle
Activist
Member # 32076

Icon 1 posted      Profile for tbelle     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Thank you that makes me feel a little bit better.

I will have to just wait. I am going to continue to freak out and panic. My ex partner asked me what is wrong but I can't tell him. My breasts are very sore and I don't know why...I mean, sometimes I get that way when I get PMS but it's usually 50% of the time.

Posts: 107 | From: New England | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
OWL Dan
Activist
Member # 49077

Icon 1 posted      Profile for OWL Dan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Do you ever feel this anxious or “irresponsible” about others things as you do about even the slightest hint of a pregnancy risk? Either way, have you ever thought of talking with someone about these feelings? Your symptoms are not uncommon and you may also want to consider talking with your Dr or Gyn about your PMS symptoms. There may be something they can recommend to ease your symptoms.

--------------------
Dan

Posts: 842 | From: Ohio | Registered: Sep 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tbelle
Activist
Member # 32076

Icon 1 posted      Profile for tbelle     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
There is one thing.

Three nights ago, when we used the condom for penetration, I put it on inside out at first. Then before we used it he put it on the right way. Is there any chance this could be risky? He hadn't ejaculated before, so it must have been a small amount of precum on it? Also, he didn't go very deep at all (we have never done that).

I think I have a good reason to be anxious. I am terrified of this!

Posts: 107 | From: New England | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
OWL Dan
Activist
Member # 49077

Icon 1 posted      Profile for OWL Dan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
There wasn’t any real risk with this either. Pre-ejaculate does not normally contain sperm; the only time there might be any chance of having any sperm is if the guy had recently ejaculated and there was a few sperm left over in his urethra.

I was simply asking if there were other things that you were also this anxious about. When someone’s this terrified about something, many people have found it helpful to talk about their fears with someone and has helped them to bring them back under control of their fears. I just thought that it would be something you might want to think about.

--------------------
Dan

Posts: 842 | From: Ohio | Registered: Sep 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tbelle
Activist
Member # 32076

Icon 1 posted      Profile for tbelle     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Well, I did talk with my friend/guy that I have been sexually involved with, last night. He is also very worried about this.

Even though there may be a slight risk, the idea of getting pregnant...I mean, that would ruin my life. At this point I can't take EC so there's nothing I can do except wait.

Posts: 107 | From: New England | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
OWL Dan
Activist
Member # 49077

Icon 1 posted      Profile for OWL Dan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
One other thing to think about, which may help you relax a little more, is that the early symptoms of pregnancy such as morning sickness do not show up this early in the timeline. You would have had already missed a period before those symptoms would show up. You can always take a test 10-14 days after the date in question or after your period is late. Once again, as Stephanie and I have said, there was little to no risk with the activities you described.

--------------------
Dan

Posts: 842 | From: Ohio | Registered: Sep 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
tbelle
Activist
Member # 32076

Icon 1 posted      Profile for tbelle     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Okay....I just have one more question. What kinds of activities would be considered high risk? Other than having full intercourse without any protection?

thanks again

[ 01-26-2011, 09:13 PM: Message edited by: tbelle ]

Posts: 107 | From: New England | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
OWL Dan
Activist
Member # 49077

Icon 1 posted      Profile for OWL Dan     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Here s an article that may help you to better understand what may or may not be considered a risk. Pregnancy Scared?
The key thing here is protection, it can be as inexpensive and as easy as condoms. Please don't think of this as preaching, but just a friendly reminder.

--------------------
Dan

Posts: 842 | From: Ohio | Registered: Sep 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3