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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Stimulation is "just too much"

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Author Topic: Stimulation is "just too much"
Steve1482
Neophyte
Member # 48800

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My girlfriend has a problem reaching orgasm, but it is not the same problem that I keep reading other girls are having. I know that the problem usually is that a girl just "can't get over the edge" or something of the sort, but my girlfriend's "problem" is quite different.

We have not yet had sex, and don't plan to until marriage, but we have touched each other. It's easy for me to turn her on, but every time it seems like she is ready to climax, she physically pushes me away. She tells me that it's not on purpose, but that whatever I'm doing is just too intense and that she can't take it anymore. Sometimes after we've played with each other she says that her vagina is sore. Am I being too hard? Is it possible to get her to orgasm without getting to the point where she "can't take it anymore?" I haven't read or heard about this happening before; is this common?

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Kath
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Member # 48639

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I used to have a similar problem when my boyfriend was pleasuring me. The issue was that he was moving too fast and placing too much pressure too early on in my arousal stages. Maybe if you take things slower, and use a lighter touch that may help. If she presses her pelvis against your hand or says something like 'more', that's a sign that she would like more pressure.
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Kachina
Scarleteen Volunteer
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I can have that problem as well. The clit is very sensitive, sometimes there is just too much sensation. I've found a tongue can be a bit better at giving pressure, but not "too much", than a finger if you want to try that.

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~Kat
Scarleteen Volunteer

Humans are allergic to change. They love to say, "We've always done it this way." I try to fight that. That's why I have a clock on my wall that runs counter-clockwise. - Grace Hopper

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Can I ask if it's possible she has ALREADY had an orgasm? I ask because very quickly feeling overstimulated when something just felt great before, especially if the activity hasn't been changed up, is fairly typical after orgasm for people with vulvas.

Does she orgasm on her own with masturbation? I ask that because knowing that will help me know what to suggest.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Steve1482
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Member # 48800

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No, I don't believe that she already had an orgasm. In fact, according to her she has never had an orgasm. It's not a quick feeling of overstimulation; it's more of a build up.
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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So, she has attempted masturbation on her own and has not, so far as she knows or can tell, ever reached orgasm?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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