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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Lubrication (arousal?) issues

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Author Topic: Lubrication (arousal?) issues
pantas25
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First of all, I had my first orgasm with my boyfriend the other other night- and it was AMAZING. I've only ever been able to climax through masturbation, so it was a HUGE accomplishment to be able to come with him. [Smile] [Big Grin]

However, last night, we ended up having terrible sex. The first time we tried, we heard someone coming (we're both 17 and still living at home, which means being very quiet and unadventurous- and as a couple, we are neither of those things) and immediately stopped and took a break. We tried again after everyone had gone to bed, and by then it was like I couldn't get wet enough. I was so dry he could barely get in (he is pretty big, which could be part of the problem). We kept trying manual stimulation, but it was like I just couldn't get lubricated enough. It completely killed the mood, and I know he felt terrible about it. I feel guilty that no matter how badly I want to have sex with him right then and there, it won't work. It's really, really frustrating. We've never used actual lubricant, but I'm really considering it now that this problem has surfaced. What's the deal? Do we need more foreplay or something? And if lube is the answer, what's a good 'starter' brand? And, um, how do you even USE lube? We use condoms only occasionally- like, when do you put it on, and WHERE do you put it?

Posts: 14 | From: Midwest | Registered: Jun 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
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Sounds like the first was a good experience [Smile] .

Honestly, lube can be used not just for intercourse but for other types of sex as well (for instance, with manual sex it cam make it feel a lot better. It's difficult to be relaxed, comfortable, and sometimes even fully aroused knowing there's a chance you might get caught. Your not feeling fully aroused may have something to do with having to stop because of someone coming and that worry. But being wet enough on your own or not, Lube is always a nice additive. If not using condoms, you can simply put some of your hand and transfer it to the vulva and penis. For condoms, you want to put a drop or two inside the condom,and some on the outside. (Make sure it's a water based lube. Some good brands are Astroglide, Liquid Silk,and Pink).

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

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