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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » ouch

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Author Topic: ouch
howmuchdouknow
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I just recently had sex with someone with a curvature in his penis.. it was a fairly decent curve and it felt very different.. it didnt go straight in almost i had to move my body so it went in right.. when he was moving in and out it felt as though it was hitting something on the side of me almost like he was poking at my hip.. i have not experienced it with someone who had such a curved penis.. is this normal?
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howmuchdouknow
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Does anyone have any info for me?
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Nailo
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Firstly, please be patient when waiting for replies. These are very busy forums, and we can assure you no one is ignoring you on purpose. No need to post again to remind us you're there [Razz]

As for the curvature, that's completely normal. A penis never sticks up at a 90° angle. Since everyone is different, I imagine that some penises are more curved than others.

I honestly don't know what he was hitting. All I can ask is if you were properly aroused, if you used lubricant, if you communicated this to your partner. Communication is VERY important. In my opinion, it is especially important with a new partner because you don't yet know the likes and dislikes of a person. Possibly, he was in a position that was uncomfortable for you, but that's ok, because you can always tell him that, and if he's a nice guy, he'll hear you out. Just communicate until you feel comfortable. If you feel the pain persists anyway, I'd say ask a gynecologist.

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000
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"A penis never sticks up at a 90° angle"

Actually, a 90 degree angle would make intercourse pretty difficult. I don't think she was talking about the penis angle, but rather the shape of the penis itself.

What do you mean "it was poking towards your hip"? Was it poking to the left or right, you mean, as opposed to back or front? I guess trying other positions is one idea, but if you're aroused and you two just can't fit together comfortably, probably best not to have sex with that person.

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howmuchdouknow
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Yes he is bent at probably at a 25 degree angle towards the left.. so when it goes in it like feels like it is hitting my side or more towards my hip then going to straight into me.. when this happens it feels like he is hitting the same spot when he goes in and out and it isn't a really a pain but a discomfort... i try to adjust so it doesnt hit the same spot over and over
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howmuchdouknow
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Is this what you are talking about? can you relate to what i am saying?
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Nailo
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I repeat. If you haven't done so already, talk to him about it. To me, it sounds like you're just trying to fix the "problem" yourself instead of telling him your uncomfortable. Everyone feels uncomfortable with certain positions. That doesn't mean sex with that particular person just plain won't work, or that you just have to deal with it. Tell him that you're uncomfortable, ask him to move. After all, you trust him enough to have sex with him, right? That should also mean you trust him enough to communicate properly.
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jamma
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my boyfriends got a pretty curved penis. i think its to the left. its probably hitting your pelvis bone, i don't like the way it feels so i dont really like the missonary position. try doggy style. and make sure theres lots of fourplay for you not for him. that widens and lubricates your vagina making it less painfull.
hope that helps!

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howmuchdouknow
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Thanks jamma that was more what i was looking for it should help.. yea we usually just did missionary so that might be the reason.. why is his curved? my boyfriend had a bad circumcision and the skin was pulled over.. it is jus something you have to deal with i guess
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bloobear
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Why a person is curved is a diffcult question. Kinda like, why are some girls labias more pronounced then others. Some pepole belive it's due to evoultion within seprate cultures. Like perhaps there use to be a tribe. This tribe gradually evolved to the point were there penis were curved for fertilaty reasons. This would be of course over many genrations. Now a days cultures are so mixed you get some men with more curvature then others

Personally I'v allways found curved better perhaps due to the structure of my own vaginal cavity.

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000
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"pepole belive it's due to evoultion within seprate cultures. Like perhaps there use to be a tribe. This tribe gradually evolved to the point were there penis were curved for fertilaty reasons."

Umm, sorry, but this doesn't make sense to me. I would like to see sources. (Really, I don't mean to be rude, it's just that this sort of "there are evolutionary reasons for everything" thinking often leads people to believe it's better to be one thing over another, which is often not the case)

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Bebop Bodhisattva
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Indeed. Evolution occurs as a response to specific circumstances. There's no overall "better," different things adapt to different situations.

--------------------
"This war all around us is being fought over the very meanings of words." - Chad Dumier, Deus Ex

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jamma
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everyones different is right.
i don't know about the circumcision thing. when my brothers baby got a circumcision the doctor said he made sure to leave extra skin for room to grow. maybe it that removal of skin does have something to do with how the penis grows.

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Heather
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Not everyone is circumcised, and curvature is normal on cut and uncut penises. (And no penis is going to be hitting the bones of the pelvis: think about where they are in relationship to the vaginal canal. They're not there to hit.)

It's not really anything we need crazy theories about: just like our noses vary in shape and size, so do genitals.

And the more sexual partners you have, usually, the more you discover how varies we all are, and how, when it comes to sexual acvities with a partner where we're interlocking parts, our given "fit" is going to vary a lot with different partners. This is some of the reason why "sexual technique" advice can be so useless: applying the same rules to everyone tends to be pretty ineffective.

So, when we have a new partner, we spend time exploring what positions and activities work best for us, as two individuals. And most of the time -- all of the time, really, unless we just light on the right thing by sheer luck -- that just takes some time, some communication and some practice. But since it should be fun, it's no big.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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