Donate Now
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » difficulty ejaculating & other guy stuff

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: difficulty ejaculating & other guy stuff
nousername
Neophyte
Member # 10201

Icon 11 posted      Profile for nousername     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
my boyfriend has no problem getting an erection, but he can't cum. he says he's never been able to with another person. when he jacks himself off, he cums in a normal amount of time. i have never heard of this kind of problem. i have to say that stress is most likely not the only factor, because i have made it very clear to him i have no expectations of him, etc., and he says he is comfortable with me. blahblah. is there anything besides stress that could be causing this?

also, is it possible for a guy's hormones to be regulated monthly, as if they had a period? at the beginning and end of the month, he acts as if he were a girl on her period for a week. he even gets pms-like symptoms beforehand and craves chocolate. what causes this?


Posts: 3 | From: Houston, TX, USA | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mnsouthpawjr
Activist
Member # 9384

Icon 1 posted      Profile for mnsouthpawjr     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
It probably isn't you that prevents his ejaculation. It could be that he isn't ready for sex. I know I was nervous, scared, and stressed my first few times. There's a chance too that the condom is delaying if not eliminating the climax. I know from my experience, I've ejaculated sooner without a condom.

I wonder if his doctor could offer any advice or look into this matter.

Continue to comfort and support him.


Posts: 73 | From: Louisville, KY USA | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Jill
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5375

Icon 1 posted      Profile for -Jill     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by mnsouthpawjr:
There's a chance too that the condom is delaying if not eliminating the climax. I know from my experience, I've ejaculated sooner without a condom.

However that is absolutely no reason to risk your health and his by having unprotected sex.

Here is a previous discussion on the topic; try the search engine if you need more information. http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum2/HTML/001735.html

[This message has been edited by ookuotoe (edited 10-09-2002).]


Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
KittenGoddess
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 1679

Icon 1 posted      Profile for KittenGoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
Originally posted by mnsouthpawjr:
There's a chance too that the condom is delaying if not eliminating the climax.

While condoms may help to delay ejaclation sometimes, they certainly don't eliminate orgasm.

As our dear Miz Scarlet said not too long ago...

quote:
Generally, one hears the "I can't have an orgasm with a condom on" line from very young men who have rarely -- if EVER -- even used condoms to find out what works best for them. It is a cop-out, and my guess is it has a lot to do with younger men simply feeling embarassed to fumble around with comdoms, or perhaps embarassed because they don't know how to use them yet and don't want to appear inexperienced in front of their partners. It also tends to be said only by men who think their partners will let them get away with that sort of thing and risk their health for their partners pleasure, which is sad and scary.

------------------
KittenGoddess
Scarleteen Advocate (and Labia Lady)

"The whole world is full of morons...they just congregate on the internet cause it's easy for them to push the buttons."


Posts: 7316 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
nousername
Neophyte
Member # 10201

Icon 1 posted      Profile for nousername     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
we aren't having sex yet, and no condoms are involved. by the way, he's 17, if that makes a difference.
Posts: 3 | From: Houston, TX, USA | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
KittenGoddess
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 1679

Icon 1 posted      Profile for KittenGoddess     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I'm a bit confused then...if you aren't having sex, and he can ejaculate on his own, then how do you know he has a problem ejaculating? Am I incorrect in assuming from your post that you're having some sort of sex? All sorts of sex come with risks, so if you're involved in any sort of mutual sexual activity you should be using condom/dental dams/gloves.

------------------
KittenGoddess
Scarleteen Advocate (and Labia Lady)

"The whole world is full of morons...they just congregate on the internet cause it's easy for them to push the buttons."


Posts: 7316 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
nousername
Neophyte
Member # 10201

Icon 1 posted      Profile for nousername     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
oh, nevermind, i forgot. i took sex to mean intercourse. nevermind then. but there are no condoms, etc. involved, and that shouldn't make a difference anyhow. (i know he has no stds or anything, and neither do i. and i only give him hand jobs and the occasional blow job, so pregnancy is not a risk. i also know that you will still encourage us to use condoms, etc., but that really isn't why i posted.)
Posts: 3 | From: Houston, TX, USA | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mnsouthpawjr
Activist
Member # 9384

Icon 1 posted      Profile for mnsouthpawjr     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I never advocated or have I engaged in but safe sex. I shared my experience in this matter.
Having a monogomous relationship and testing clean allows any couple the right to eliminate condoms.

Originally posted by ookuotoe:
However that is absolutely no reason to risk your health and his by having unprotected sex.

[This message has been edited by mnsouthpawjr (edited 10-10-2002).]


Posts: 73 | From: Louisville, KY USA | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
logic_grrl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 8067

Icon 1 posted      Profile for logic_grrl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
quote:
i also know that you will still encourage us to use condoms, etc.

Bingo .

quote:
i know he has no stds or anything, and neither do i.

Unless you've both had full STD screens, I'm afraid you have no way of knowing that.


Posts: 6944 | From: UK | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
JoeNKirst
Neophyte
Member # 9726

Icon 1 posted      Profile for JoeNKirst     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I've had this problem when i first started being sexual with my girlfriend. And the cause of it was nervousness or fear. It has never happened with any girl previously but with this new girl (who i'm married to know..heh) not to sound to cliche but i knew that she was special and it scared me cause i thought i had to be extra great in bed and that nervousness just killed me. I finally got the nerve up to talk to her about it and she made it much easier on me and she really understood what was happening and she went slower and i finally realized that i don't have to be extra amazing because she's gonna love me anyway. So it quickly ended and it hasn't ever been a problem since. I hope some of this can help.
Posts: 11 | From: Saskatoon, SK, Canada | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3