posted
Hey, ok so i started dating about 5 years ago and so far the only relationships i have had have been with males although these relationships have lasted a few months at most. I've always been aware that i have an attraction to women but have never done anything about it purely because of the assumptions and judgement that would most likely come with it (shallow i know). Anyway, when I have dated guys in the past, my feelings for women have seemed to take a back seat which made me think that maybe it was just a phase. Lately, however, my feelings for women are stronger than ever (possibly because i am single) and i dont know what to do. I have dated 3 guys in the past and although i have had a strong physical attraction to them, i have not had the same emotional attraction as i have had to females.
As i am a quite feminine myself and have a lot of both male and female friends, i am afraid that by letting people know how i feel my female friends may feel awkward around me. I do not want to come out as lesbian because i am not attracted to females in general (just the select few) and i am genuinely interested in guys too although not to the same degree. To be honest i can't really see myself with a man in the long term, however, i wonder if it is just because i havent met the right guy... If i found a guy who i had an emotional attraction to then i would be open to a long term relationship.
I am pretty confused about this and am considering telling people that i am bisexual, what do people think? And if i should then how should i go about it? Im at university so im very close to my group of friends, i hope that they would be ok with it (for the most part) but i just wanted to see what people thought... Any advice would be great! Thank you!
-------------------- January x Posts: 2 | From: UK | Registered: Jun 2010
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One's on sexual identity is a very personal thing, and it seems like you've been doing a lot of thinking about it.
Just so you know, what you have described is not unusual to say the least. I personally know many people who feel a stonger emotional attraction towards women, but still date guys. I myself am a bisexual woman and I am attracted to certian things particularly in women, as well as some things that I find I feel really stongley about in men.
As far as your friends go, if they were to not accept you and your identity then I think you may need to re-evaluate those friendships, because nobody deserves that. I don't know why your female friends would feel awkward around you, I would hope they know that just because a person is attracted to a cetian gender, that doesn't mean that they want a relationship with EVERYONE who fits that bill, because of course that is just not the case.
Good luck!
-------------------- "Don't knock masturbation - its sex with someone I love." -Woody Allen Posts: 121 | From: Canada | Registered: May 2010
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posted
Thank you,that is a great help!Yes i have thought about this alot and it's great to know that this situation is not uncommon. And as for my friends, i don't think that they would have a problem with it, im just making assumptions seeing as i dont know exactly what their views are about it. It's like you said, being attracted to a certain gender does not mean you are attracted to everyone of that gender so they would just have to accept it!
Thanks again!
-------------------- January x Posts: 2 | From: UK | Registered: Jun 2010
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-------------------- "Don't knock masturbation - its sex with someone I love." -Woody Allen Posts: 121 | From: Canada | Registered: May 2010
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