Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » I'm really Confused

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: I'm really Confused
Gabc
Neophyte
Member # 46613

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Gabc     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I'm 17 years old and I'm a girl.I think I'm Bisexual.I always liked guys and had had boyfriends before but lately this past year ever since this girl told me she was a lesbian I started to like her and its not just her I also find myself attracted to other girls. I also fantasizes about them.I really like this girl and i know that because every time i see her I smile or i get excited to see her.When I go out with my friends they are always checking out guys and I do too but then i find myself looking at girls.But I know that I like guys but I think I'm mostly attracted to girls.

I have watch some lesbian movies and i really like them i have also look at lesbian pron and it turns me on.

I'm not sure that I'm bi but I know that I'm not straight but I also say that I don't believe in labels.

I really don't know what to do because I can't tell anyone because I'm scared. My family is really against gays and some of my friends are homophobic.But when I see a lesbian couple i just stare because i say to myself, that must be great being who you are and not caring about what people say.

Posts: 3 | From: Los Angeles | Registered: Apr 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ecofem
Activist
Member # 13388

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Ecofem     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hi Gabc, welcome to Scarleteen! [Smile]

It sounds like you may well be bisexual but it's really something for you to decide, and we totally support not choosing labels. We have a lot of links for you to read, so I recommend checking those out first:

The Bees and...the Bees: A Homosexuality and Bisexuality Primer
Bi the Dozen: A Bisexuality Quiz
Living without Labels
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/im_bisexual_so_why_dont_i_feel_exactly_the_same_about_men_and_women
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/she_came_out_and_now_im_questioning_myself
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/gaydar/misconception_mayhem_separating_bisexuality_and_homosexuality_myths_from_facts

I'm sorry your family isn't more supportive: perhaps with time they would be, but perhaps they wouldn't. That's hard but it's really OK in that we and so many people out there do believe and support you. It would help to find friends who are more tolerant/accepting, too, because while you can't choose family, you can choose friends, and you want ones who are accepting and loving! I would argue that those lesbian couples probably do care how others see them in certain ways but are strong in other ways. [Smile] I think it'd be really good to spend some time in a LGBT-friendly environment. For example, PFLAG is a great organization to check out. Here is a list of PFLAG locations in CA: http://www.pflag.org/map/index.php?state=CA (There are numerous chapters in LA and the surrounding areas.) Do you think you could attend a meeting? Would you be interested in it?

[Smile]

Posts: 3318 | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
TheTasteOfPurple
Activist
Member # 43186

Icon 1 posted      Profile for TheTasteOfPurple     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
It's great that you are so open-minded about gay and bisexual people despite growing up in a homophobic environment. Seems like most of your attitudes about homosexuality are right-on.

Remember that identifying as "questioning" is always a choice, and one that's just as valid as identifying as bi or lesbian. And of course, so is not labeling yourself at all! There's a great article on this site called Living Without Labels.

If you have friends who you know won't be judgmental about your sexuality or try to convince you that you're somebody you're not (and who won't talk about it without your express permission) I'd suggest talking to them about it. Getting things out there, even if not to everyone, usually helps with getting them figured out.

I bet there are oodles of LGBT-friendly groups in LA, and probably some that you can get to from where you are. It can be intimidating to go if you don't know anybody, but it's definitely worth it.

--------------------
Julia

The highest result of education is tolerance. -Helen Keller

Posts: 50 | From: Halfway down the California coast | Registered: Jul 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gabc
Neophyte
Member # 46613

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Gabc     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thanks
Those articles help

I would love to attend a meeting

I want to be happy with who I am and i want my parents to accept me no matter what

Posts: 3 | From: Los Angeles | Registered: Apr 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ecofem
Activist
Member # 13388

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Ecofem     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I'm glad those articles help! I hope you can attend a meeting soon then. [Smile] I think you will be happy with who you are but sometimes that can take time. I can't guarantee how your parents will feel but I'm certainly hopeful that they'll be understanding and supportive but, as I said before, I can't say for sure. We'll see... is there anything else we can help you with for now, Gabc? [Smile]
Posts: 3318 | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gabc
Neophyte
Member # 46613

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Gabc     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thank you
For now that's all Ecofem thank you and if i read right I'll be attending a meeting on April 21

Posts: 3 | From: Los Angeles | Registered: Apr 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3