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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » How do you approach a woman?

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Author Topic: How do you approach a woman?
Member # 32667

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If I actually decide to test my bisexual feelings, how do you just go up to a woman and say "I like you. Please go out with me." How do I know I won't offend?
Posts: 5 | From: California | Registered: Feb 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 28394

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Unfortunately, you can't know how someone feels before you ask. However I think regardless of gender you'd be better off simply getting to know people, and If you like someone just talk to them, and you could get to know them a lot better, then from there you would already have a better idea of how they'd react if you wanted to take it further.

I'd find going up to ANYONE and saying "I like you. Please go out with me." a bit scary to say the least. But there are confident people out there who say quite similar things, and if your one of those people- good on you.

I'm also not sure that you should be asking people out just to test your feelings, you could learn allot more, just from keeping track of your reactions to being round girls. You don't need to go out with them to find out if you're attracted to them.

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Posts: 633 | From: Bedfordshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
plain milyeh
Member # 32511

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if you're good at asking boys out, chances are you're probably going to be pretty skillfull at asking boys out, too. it's the same basic process of meeting people, figuring out if they might like you, and risking finding out that they don't by asking if they want to do something possibly leading to smooches with you. (you probably shouldn't phrase it that way. um. good old fashioned "out for coffee" is still pretty good, i gather...) yes, it's usually a little less awkward trying to figure out if the boy you like is sexually compatible with you, but...that is part of the fun?

no, i know, it kind of sucks. we should get decoder rings. queer kid decoder rings. with lasers! (i'm not sure what i'm on about now, but i'm pretty sure it'll be brilliant once i figure out how to make them out of cardboard, duct tape, and too many sparkles.)

[ 02-22-2007, 10:37 PM: Message edited by: plain milyeh ]

Posts: 108 | From: caaaaanada. ('cause we've got rocks and trees and trees and rocks...) | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
across the universe
Member # 29307

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I would love queer kid decoder rings..or bling. like, a decree that everyone must wear obviously queer bling.


xx___be beautiful.

"those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

Posts: 24 | From: Massachusetts | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 30201

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you could start by when you're getting to know people actually talking about the fact that you're queer. you can see how people react. I would think that if you're open about it other queer people are more likely to be open with you. And then you find out, yeah? You could also wear queer bling yourself, and see if people approach you (did you ever wonder why gay subcultures often develop a pretty definite "look"? I'm willing to bet making it easier to meet people plays a role)

However, yeah, you shouldn't ask somebody out unless you /know/ you're somewhat attracted to them, if that's at all a concern for you. The straight girl who later rescinds her actions as just "experimenting" or "playing around" is not the most beloved of creatures in a lot of lesbian circles.

[ 02-24-2007, 03:41 PM: Message edited by: iheartdc ]

Posts: 443 | Registered: Aug 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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