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Author Topic: Taking Things Too Far
Pixie69
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Member # 406

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To make a long story short, I kissed a girl the other night. She's a friend of mine that likes me, but she's not really my type (butch, I usually like femmey girls, although femme has apparently been changed to 'lipstick'. Apparently I wasn't informed of this universal decision ). So anyways, I'm not going to get into the details of what happened or how it happened or why it happened, it just sorta did because I was feeling a little crazy and I knew my friend wanted to kiss my other friend (who was "bi for the night") so I kind of started it off.

I'm afraid that I took things too far, because I actually liked it - a lot - and now I'm all flipped upside down because I'm not understanding what I want. Usually I know what I want and I go get it, but I didn't want it, and then I got it, and now I want it more. And I'm confusing myself even as I type this. Any insight on my situation or what I should do or any stories of yourself you want to talk about. Or if you just wnat to tell me a funny joke that would be okay too....

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Brittany
Scarleteen Advocate

real poetry is all based on this old myth about this beautiful, scary, trippy goddess who the poet wants to possess but he always loses her to this shadowy other guy - Girl Goddess #9


Posts: 1339 | From: Las Vegas, NV, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
DrQuack5
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I have a funny joke. I don't know if it's really appropriate for Scarleteen (it's not dirty or anything) ... but whatever.

Q: What do you get when you rub two boyscouts together?
A: Arrested

This joke makes me laugh everytime I hear/tell it.


Posts: 290 | From: Minneapolis | Registered: Feb 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
rambler
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Talk to her, hon...

I mean, it's definitely better than sitting and thinking it over and over and driving yourself nuts. I guess you could say I like femme girls as well, but I don't think that THAT should be the reason why you don't persue her--obviously, you like her, so don't worry about what type she is...

You won't know if she feels the same way until you talk to her, and if you don't talk to her, you'll never know. I know that this was kind of a random act, but hey, it taught you a little bit about yourself, and you're doing better than I ever have... I am the queen of pining over girls and never doing anything about it. Don't be like that, 'cause it's dumb and it will drive you nuts. Been there.

ESPECIALLY since this is your friend (I think), you should really just be honest with her and talk to her. It might not go well, but hey, it could go a lot better than you think.

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rambler
Visit disabledsex.org -- Disability and Sexuality.
Or, find out how to join the teen discussion list
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well.
--Joe Ancis


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alaska
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Have you seen her since then, Pixie gal? If not, go out and see her. Oh, I know all about the confusion after a good night of smooching with someone I really didn't have the hots for and then thinking on the next day...oy oy oy oy - What am I feeling here? What does it mean?

Usually, being around that person or talking to them (not necessarily about what happened, just in general) helped me sort my thoughts, whether I was indeed falling in lust or maybe something else or whether I was just generally confused or temporarily insane or whatever else.
And if you know a little better what you want, I'd talk to her about it. - at least if it's something you feel you need to share with her (aka, you've fallen in love).

*huggles* to you, gal.

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Caro
~spanking new Scarleteen Sexpert~

"We must become the change we want to see."
Mahatma Gandhi


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rambler
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I should add this:

It seems as if you are debating whether or not what you did was a bad thing... Well, the thing is, you can really go nuts that way. The bottom line is that you did it, and I don't know her reaction (for instance the look on her face immediately after, or whatever), but I seriously doubt she is all of a sudden going to hate you or something. There's nothing wrong with wanting someone sexually--you just have to decide if you want to persue it from here.
It sounds as if you do. So try not to second guess yourself. Something you've already done can't be taken back, but you can try to not agonize over it. You're going to run across this girl again, and I don't think it's worth avoiding her or what have you just because maybe you are embarrassed or nervous about what happened. It's really not worth going to that much trouble over.

Anyway, good luck!

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rambler
Visit disabledsex.org -- Disability and Sexuality.
Or, find out how to join the teen discussion list
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well.
--Joe Ancis


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Pixie69
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Well, I know she won't hate me, I've talked to her since and she basically woke up kicking herself for not taking better advantage of the situation (two girls she was in love with...ready and willing...). So I have talked to her and I know she comes here so she's read my posts and I've been getting advice from...everyone, lol. And I know she's basically up for anything (sexual, romantic) so it's kind of just about me figuring out what I want. She's coming over in an hour (speaking of which I need to go shower) because we can't go to our GBLT youth group today so I figured we should hang out....

So far the census is that I should really think about what I want because I did the switcheroo from not liking her to liking her really super duper fast, and that's not really me, so what they're basically saying is I haven't gotten any for a while and I'm confusing like with lust (like so many people do). So I guess I'll just have to wait it out and see what happens...

And I'm sorta worried because I've only been in one relationship when I wasn't cutting. One. And that ended horribly and was basically the cause of me starting to cut again. So...I'm just really worried if I can handle it and whatnot. I mean, it's only been a month since I've stopped, am i really ready for a relationship? We'll just have to see..

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Brittany
Scarleteen Advocate

real poetry is all based on this old myth about this beautiful, scary, trippy goddess who the poet wants to possess but he always loses her to this shadowy other guy - Girl Goddess #9


Posts: 1339 | From: Las Vegas, NV, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
alaska
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big fat huggles to you, pix girl.

am thinking about you this very moment and sending tons of make-up-your-mind-and-find-out-what-you-really-want-energy your way.


Posts: 4526 | From: germany | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
PixieDust
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This person must feel like a real loser for not taking advantage of what she could have.

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"We are the normal"-Johny Rznick


Posts: 86 | From: Las Vegas, NV, United States | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Pixie69
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Well, if anyone is wondering....I've sorta figured it out. Me and the chika are looking for different things in a relationship right now, which is obviously a big deal. And while I know she would,I don't want her to change what she wants and i don't want to change what I want jsut for the sake of having a relationship. And...I dont' think I'm ready for one right now anyway Thanks Caro, rambler, and you too Dr. Quack!

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Brittany
Scarleteen Advocate

real poetry is all based on this old myth about this beautiful, scary, trippy goddess who the poet wants to possess but he always loses her to this shadowy other guy - Girl Goddess #9


Posts: 1339 | From: Las Vegas, NV, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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