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Author Topic: Member size and such
AnonaJohnson
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Member # 41132

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Well I have read many and many an article about the issues of penis length and girth and such. On one hand I hear how it doesn't matter the size, but how you use it and it don't matter what size because females are quite capable of making them self cum by thought alone. HOWEVER, I hear many of the female gender speaking about "BIG DICK" this and "BIG DICK" that whether in reference to a toy they use or a boyfriend (previous or current). They say size don't matter, yet at the same time some say size has its perks. I hear the vagina can only feel 2 - 3 inch's within its vestibule. Honestly I'm 6 in long 5 in girth fully erect (Average so i hear) yet it seems average gets remarks like (Eh, that's OK" or "eh i can work with that" which can be really degrading and discouraging. I honestly don't know what to believe. I know different girls and guys come in many shapes and sizes and everyone has a preference, but it seems many want the extravagant. I hear it don't matter how big but how you use it, or it don't matter the size if they love you and such, but that doesn't stop your partner from knowing what they want and if you meet their standards. Whats your take on it? I'm just confused and discouraged at this point.
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September
Scarleteen Volunteer
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Why don't you take a look at this article and see if that answers your questions:
Shown Actual Size: A Penis Shape & Size Lowdown

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Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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Thehiddenone
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Heya, I'm a girl. Ha no surprise.

I dont mind a guys size to be honest, it doesn't really matter, The size doesnt affect pleasure at all [For myself anyway] It's about the right 'spots' in my eyes [Big Grin] Anyway hope i helped a tad [Big Grin]

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StrangePudding
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My boyfriend's penis is about the same size as yours and honestly, I often find that it looks enormous to me. Probably just because his is the only penis I've seen, but it still doesn't look tiny or anything. I've never had problems with his length or width. idk if this helps, but know that there are men out there with your size penis who are doing just fine. If you think about your penis positively, it makes it more likely that other will, too.
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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quote:
it seems average gets remarks like (Eh, that's OK" or "eh i can work with that" which can be really degrading and discouraging
Anona, are these comments being made to you by partners of yours?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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GodivaSyndrome
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Honestly, I think it really is how you use it rather than how big it is. I know you're probably tired of hearing this, but if you're a loving partner and communicate well, you'll be fine. My current partner's penis is about 5 inches long and he has never had any problems pleasing me whereas a former partner with 7 inches under his belt was rather sloppy and didn't make it feel very good at all, despite being "above average".

Instead of worrying if you're big enough for some girls, I would try to hone in on my skills and try to be communicative and loving. That will get you much further than a few more inches.

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k486
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^ completely agree with that post, a guy could be way above average length and still not be able to satisfy a girl. Love and good communication are key- sex is always much better if it's about love and not just about, well, sex. [Smile] And you'll probably be able to tell from how she moves and sounds what feels particularly good for her, and you should never be afraid to ask a partner for guidance, to tell/show you what feels great [Smile] It's a learning process, and that should be fun! ^^

And tbh, you're right, the really sensitive areas can be reached within the first few inches. My fiancé is the same size as you, and I think he's the ideal size. In some positions, he can go a bit too deep and bump my cervix which is really uncomfortable xD So I definitely wouldn't want him to be any bigger, otherwise sex would probably become painful for me after a while.

Please ignore people going on and on about guys with huge penises.. it's really not important at all. And from what I've heard, the average girl is only going to be able to accomodate 6-7 inches anyway so a huuuge penis is probably a bit of a waste xD

I've lost the link now, but I sent my fiancé a chart I found, it showed lengths and girths of penises in a chart and had coded them all from A to E (A being perfect/ideal length and girth, very pleasurable, and E being not pleasurable at all) and he was either a B or an A, which made him feel a whole lot less dissatisfied with it xD

Keep in mind that most if not all guys feel dissatisfied with their penis for some reason or another. There's just so much rubbish going round about how a penis should be (to make you try and take pills or get surgery so some idiot can make money out of your insecurity -__-) but try to ignore it. [Smile]

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AnonaJohnson
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Heather:
quote:it seems average gets remarks like (Eh, that's OK" or "eh i can work with that" which can be really degrading and discouraging

Anona, are these comments being made to you by partners of yours?
__________________________________________________

I heard one phrase from a friend and such. Usually any partner I had said its fine, yet my one ex said I was fine yet she was also the promiscuous type and had many sizes. So things like that made me insecure

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appleorchard
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it seems girls have just become consumed with the idea of penis size. Honestly, when I found out my boyfriends was a bit...over average, i was excited. it hadn't crossed my mine and was never a concern. but then to find out it was about 4 inches over average? Well, as pop culture has ruined my mind, i later thought about it. If anything it just makes things harder, such as oral, and manual. As you said, we can only feel 2-3 inches. As i understand girth, the length arguement escapes me
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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quote:
I heard one phrase from a friend and such. Usually any partner I had said its fine, yet my one ex said I was fine yet she was also the promiscuous type and had many sizes. So things like that made me insecure.
You know, someone expressing they have seen or experienced more than one size is...well, someone saying nothing about your size. In other words, I can express to my partner that I have dated many people who all look different, and when I say that, I'm just speaking to a diversity, not to any one way of looking being better or worse than any other.

I want to also add something to all of this: even the idea that if and when someone DOES have preferences in the penis department, it's about length or only about length doesn't make sense. How something feels inside a vagina is more complex than that: it's about the width of a given thing, the curve of a given thing, the shape of a given thing, the texture, then how it (whether we are talking penises, fingers, toys) moves within the vagina, the works. And all of that also has to do with the given vagina at hand, as well as how it feels on a given day: let's please remember that the vagina is not a passive object, but a muscle that expands and contracts. I can tell you as someone older with a great deal of sexual experience that when it comes to my male lovers, their penis size is usually the last thing I remember about them, and if asked, I couldn't begin to tell you what the penis sizes of most of my exes even were. It's just not that memorable a thing.

(FYI, I sometimes remind men who have their knickers in a twist about this that if you ever have the chance to visit a woman's sex shop, you'll see that for the most part, most of the dildos which women buy are NOT in monster sizes: most tend to be just above average in length, and considering they are often used by hand -- so there needs to be room for the user to hold the base to use it -- that tells you a lot.)

Honestly, I really do think that the women (who I would say are relatively uncommon, and broad study backs that up) who get fixated on size are inheriting that fixation from men, who have always been the common group to have that fixation. Most of this junk about size comes right from you guys. So, when you start to feel insecure about this stuff, see if you can't check in with yourself and recognize that you are probably projecting your own insecurities unto other people. And if your friends are talking trash, don't presume that's how a partner is going to speak to you or even think.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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AnonaJohnson
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Member # 41132

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I appreciate the input. Grazi
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