posted
I am a little anxious. I am thinking about having sex for the first time and I am slightly scared, but I feel ready, but I think a have a slightly unusual situation. The man I am going to have sex with is just a friend and bisexual (mostly gay). I trust him to prepare and have a fun with it, but I am wondering if I am the odd girl out, just considering to have sex with someone I dont plan to build a relationship with?
posted
I don't think that the first time you have sex it should be some random off the wall thing. Being one with someone is a personal and deep thing, and I don't think you should waste it. I'm not saying that your friend is bad or anything, just that you should respect yourself more so that you'll understand that virginity is not something to just toss out the window. You will remember your first time for the rest of your life, and I bet if you go through with this, later on you'll regret it. Think about it for a while dear before you do anything drastic. You don't need to have sex to be somebody...you already are.
------------------ *The only need for a baseball bat besides hitting homeruns is for shattering the knee caps of every cheater in the world.
Posts: 123 | From: Wisconsin, United States | Registered: Aug 2002
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freakedout, why don't you read through these next two articles as well. Not everyone places such value (or any value at all even) on virginity. I'm not sure what you read that made you think that Snow's being disrespectful to herself; having sex with someone you care about isn't a waste, even if you're not going to have a romantic relationship. Is that all there is? - A memoir of first time sex 17 years in the making Magical Cups & Bloody Brides
[This message has been edited by ookuotoe (edited 12-03-2004).]
Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001
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posted
I understand Freakedouts concern, but I feel as if I lost my virginity already. I had another relationship and we did everything but intercourse and thats what I consider sex. I havent had intercourse before though. I think I am anxious because this is my first time. I may not feel like my virginity is on the line but this is still somthing I really want to do right (or as right as I can) and safe. The boy I am considering has never had intercourse either but has been around the block. I am planning on doing this the one condition that we go get tested together. I am really excited about this and thats what causes the nervousness Anymore comments are welcome, Thanks, Snow.
[This message has been edited by sowhatsup (edited 12-03-2004).]
posted
If you are ready, and taking all the precautions like you said (getting tested together etc) then go for it. Just make sure that you ARE ready, and this isn't something you are going to regret. Just make sure you use protection and you'll be fine =]
Posts: 1000 | From: Canada | Registered: Oct 2001
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posted
Just because you might not place value on it, doesn't mean this girl won't. I was trying to give her an opinion from a more traditional point of view (while obviously not the most traditional). I'm not being closed minded when I say I don't need to read those articles. I know how the world is today just fine from experience.
------------------ *The only need for a baseball bat besides hitting homeruns is for shattering the knee caps of every cheater in the world.
Posts: 123 | From: Wisconsin, United States | Registered: Aug 2002
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quote:Just because you might not place value on it, doesn't mean this girl won't.
And just because you do, doesn't mean she will.
Remember that what's right for you may not be right for everyone.
So telling someone as a fact that they're not "respecting" themselves if they "lose their virginity" with a friend, or that they're "wasting" something, is extremely judgemental.
quote:I'm not being closed minded when I say I don't need to read those articles. I know how the world is today just fine from experience.
Hmm ... you're assuming you know what's in the articles without even looking at them?
posted
i feel like i really know becuase i plan on doing the samthing, for my first time i am going to do it with my best buddy because i really trust him so as you can tell i dont see anything wrong with it (just my oppinion i dont want antone to get offended.
posted
Hey Snow, I think your first time with a friend is great! My first time was with a close friend, and I've never regretted it...in fact i think i'd be more concerened if you were doing it with a boyfriend, because relationships do go bad, and then there are sometimes regrets, ect, ect... Anyways, what im trying to say it that if your ready, if your sure, and if your safe I hope that its great for you and him, and that you remain friends after! ~Sapph
Posts: 7 | From: Canada | Registered: Dec 2004
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posted
Like Sapph I, too, 'lost' my virginity to a friend, after much consideration and discussion, and preparation, and it was great! I think that if you've thought about it a lot, have a good, close relationship with your friend, and feel that it's what you want to do, then go for it. I also reckon nervousness is natural, especially if it's the excited kind of nervousness [i still get that whenever i sleep with anyone and it's half the fun!], so just make the situation as relaxed and comfy as possible. I hope everything works out for you!
-ruthi xx
------------------ - you think you're the only one who's sexually frustrated? - well come on baby , i'm ready!
[ american beauty ]
http://thebitch.mustbehere.com
Posts: 100 | From: london, england | Registered: Dec 2001
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