Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
  New Poll  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » I want sex but I'm afraid.....help!

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: I want sex but I'm afraid.....help!
Goth guy*69
Neophyte
Member # 10065

Icon 4 posted      Profile for Goth guy*69     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I'm quite young and I'm not sure my parents would approve but I want to exsperience sex!I'm not forced by friends or anything its my choice!But I havent met sum 1 that I can open up to who will,the age thing comes in!I am very mature and get told it by a variety of people!
I've almost gone all the way at concerts but only end up kissing. I'm afraid I'll have a one night stand and get branded a rapest or sum thing!

What should I do?

[This message has been edited by Goth guy*69 (edited 09-26-2002).]


Posts: 1 | From: Wales | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
bettie
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 78

Icon 1 posted      Profile for bettie     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I am moving this topic to a more appropriate section -Body and Soul.

------------------
-Scarleteen Sexpert

"Glad to have a friend like you,
And glad to just be me"
-Carol Hall


Posts: 1060 | From: Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 568

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Gumdrop Girl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
keyword: afraid
i'd be wary of trying to have sex if something is still makeing your feel afraid.

sex is something you need to be 110% sure about before undertaking it. it's not just wham, bam, thank you ma'am, it involves a lot of responsibility (health issues for you and your partner, feeling and emotions, and a whole lot of planning should anything go not-according to plans)

check out these articles, and take their words seriously.
http://www.scarleteen.com/sexuality/firsttime.html http://www.scarleteen.com/sexuality/safer.html http://www.scarleteen.com/sexuality/readiness.html

you don't have to be with the love of oyur life. If it's a one-night stand, it's a one-snight stand. But can you handle obtaining condoms and lube without embarrassment or fear of punishment? Can you go to your doctor and ask for a full STD screen every 6 months? Can you safely ask your partner all the important questions (have you been tested recently? do you have any infections? are you of legal age for consent? etc.). Does discussing sex, especially safer sex, with your partner make oyu uncomfortable? if she for any reason *does* get pregnant, do you have the $$$ and resouces to support a child, or pay for an abortion? If you for any reason get an infection like HIV, can you pay for treatment?

These are all important things to think about. Sex is a heavy task and shouldn't be taken lightly. After all, it's not just *your* body, but it's also someone else's body, too.

So chew on that for a while. Decide if this is absolutely what you want to do, and if it's the right thing for oyu to do. Otherwise, explore your own sexuality via other means, masturbation and the like.

------------------
"Things are only fragile till they break."


Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
KandyKorn17
Activist
Member # 9729

Icon 1 posted      Profile for KandyKorn17     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
As usual, Gumdrop is completely right. It's one thing to want to have sex, it's another thing to be ready. And ready doesn't just mean emotionally ready.

What you're saying is that you're "ready to go", so to speak, but you're afraid what others will think and you're not prepared for bad situations like being accused of rape? Well, keep in mind that the tricky thing with minors having sex is that consent is always gonna be a little shaky (legally), because you'll probably be sexually involved with other minors, and then if you get involved with someone older than you, then even more problems can arise.

If you're parents aren't going to approve, they might restrict your activities or keep you from seeing certain people... it can be a mess. And if you don't think you can successfully address all these issues, then you probably shouldn't have sex yet.


Posts: 98 | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
RoryM
Neophyte
Member # 10123

Icon 1 posted      Profile for RoryM     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
You can't let your parents rule you're life, but you want to make sure that you're not doing this just to spite them.
Posts: 8 | From: UK | Registered: Oct 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

  New Poll   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3