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Can't masturbate / get an orgasm

Posted: Sat Oct 13, 2018 5:33 pm
by Teachugger
Hey!
I'm a 15 year old girl. I masturbate a lot but I don't think that it's really masturbating because the outcome is kind of disappointing. I wasn't expecting fireworks or anything but I'm just not feeling much when that feeling hits me.
I only masturbate one way: I lie down on my stomach and add pressure to my clit (at least I hope it's my clit). That lasts about 30 seconds and then I get an "orgasm", which isn't an orgasm, that lasts up to 2 seconds. All of that is very disappointing but I still do it because it's better than nothing. There is no pressure building or body getting hot. It's just not what I think I should feel. I can also just keep going right after I "orgasm".
I'm pretty impatient so when I try something different and it doesn't work for me in a matter of minutes I stop.
I'm sure I just don't know how to masturbate. I also don't want to finger myself because I'm still a virgin and fingering is uncomfortable.
I thought about buying a vibrator but I don't know how since I don't want my parents to see.
Am I doing something wrong? Why do I orgasm so quickly and why doesn't it feel like masturbating and orgasming at all?

Re: Can't masturbate / get an orgasm

Posted: Sun Oct 14, 2018 1:40 am
by Siân
Hey :)

Welcome to the boards!

There's no "right" way to masturbate, often learning what feels good in our particular body is an ongoing process, and as we experiment and explore over time we add more little pieces to the jigsaw. If you'd like some other ideas, take a look at this: How Do You Masturbate?

Orgasms too can be something we learn over time - not everyone finds they start out big and obvious. In general, if you feel a buildup of tension and then release that's what we'd call an orgasm. Those feelings of buildup and release are something that can grow over time into more dramatic orgasms as you learn to recognise and appreciate them. Being present and having awareness of the sensations - rather than focusing on trying to orgasm - is often the best tactic here. Does that make sense?