Scarleteen

Hello,

I'm currently freaking out because for the first time in my life I have a cold sore. I know cold sores are caused by herpes, and I know a lot of people have it for a while and never know they have it. My problem is my boyfriend has never had a cold sore or genital herpes. I know I have to wait for the sore to go away but I'm scared I'll give it to him when the sore isn't active. I really like having oral sex with him and I don't want to give him genital herpes. I'm really scared and I'm freaking out. Please give me advice on what to do.

First off, if you haven't talked to a doctor about this, that might be a good first step to take; they might even be able to offer you options for medication that reduces outbreaks, which is when herpes is most easily transmitted. It's not impossible to transmit when you aren't in an outbreak, but it is much less likely.
Having said that, the safest thing to do is to use barriers such as condoms for oral sex, especially if you're having oral sex during an outbreak.
We have a few different articles about herpes that might help by providing additional info:
Are coldsores herpes?
The STI Files: Herpes
HPV & Herpes: Why Safer Sex Isn't Always Safe Enough