Okay, I think I get it. But unless she's a gynecologist, she's unlikely to be able to help you with that. And again, sex does not "break" any part of your body, vagina or vulva. The hymen doesn't generally "break" or get torn outside serious injury, most often from sexual violence, period. That's just not how it works. (If you haven't seen this already, here is an excellent and basic fact sheet:
My Corona: The Anatomy Formerly Known as the Hymen & the Myths That Surround It)
And as I said, I think it's important you start to try and accept that your hymen *has* already begun to erode, and DOES already have at least micro-perforations in it that occur all by themselves due to hormones and vaginal secretions alone. If it hadn't started to wear away already and didn't have at least those openings, your menstrual flow would not be able to get through when you have your period. And it does.
I get that if you have big beliefs or are part of a belief system that has giant, loaded stuff hinged to things that are simply false or wrong, it is seriously complicated and probably feels very rough and hard to process. But from your first post, it sounded like you could separate what it means for someone to choose (or not) to engage in sex, in terms of what you want and your beliefs, and outdated and inaccurate ideas about bodies, like that intercourse "breaks" the hymen, and until then, hymens are a complete, "intact" shield or covering. It may take a while to get there, but I think you can do it.
It might help to think about what this false belief has done or does for you in order to shake it. Chances are, most of what it does and has done is just stressed out out: it probably hasn't given you anything beneficial. But if you do think of ways that how you have been thinking about the hymen has actually served you well, we can most likely think of an equally effective, but also less misogynist and more factual, way of thinking about all this. (It may be as simple as recognizing you don't need a body part to "prove" you made whatever choices in life you make in this regard. You just need not to sleep with or marry jerks who wouldn't take your word for it.)