Rape nightmares

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michelle
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Rape nightmares

Unread post by michelle »

I was assaulted last year. Coping of course wasn’t easy at first--I was an emotional and physical wreck--but I feel that I’ve dealt with this experience in a relatively healthy way. I'm fortunate to have access to free counseling resources on campus (which I used), as well as friends and family who don't make me feel guilty. My university investigated my case and expelled my rapist, which was a huge step toward helping my recovery. It is now the anniversary of my assault--I remember because I came home from the hospital only to find that Donald Trump won the election, traumatizing me even further. I’ve had multiple nightmares each night for five consecutive nights, some of them about being assaulted and others just generally terrifying. My roommate tells me she hears me whimpering in my sleep. I’m exhausted, but also afraid to go back to sleep. What can I do to get some rest?
Sam W
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Re: Rape nightmares

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Michelle,

I'm so sorry someone did this to you (and that you ended up with the double-punch of the assault plus the election results at the same time). It sounds like you've taken some awesome steps to take care of yourself, and I'm so glad to hear that you have supportive loved ones and that your university backed you up.

With the nightmares, can you give me a sense of any techniques you've tried so far to deal with them (it's okay if you haven't tried anything yet, I just want to make sure I don't recommend a bunch of things that you've found don't work)? And have you had any chance to discuss the situation with a counselor?
michelle
newbie
Posts: 2
Joined: Thu Nov 09, 2017 3:42 pm
Age: 25
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her/hers
Sexual identity: heterosexual
Location: US

Re: Rape nightmares

Unread post by michelle »

I haven't really tried much--I don't know where to start. I remind myself that they're not real, but they haunt me throughout my day (and nights) nonetheless. I haven't met with my counselor for quite some time now.
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9784
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: Rape nightmares

Unread post by Sam W »

Got it. So, this is likely going to involve some trial and error and it may not make the nightmares go away entirely, but hopefully we can help you find some tools that mean they occupy less mental and emotional space. I would suggest trying to meet with the counselor again, even for just a few sessions, to see if they cam offer support and tools as well. Having intense emotional reactions, like nightmares, around the anniversary of an assault happens to plenty of survivors, so it's possible that this is a situation the counselor has helped someone with before.

As for some other tools, this article has some really concrete steps on handling nightmares that result from trauma: https://www.livingwell.org.au/managing- ... ightmares/
This article from Pandora's Project is more about dealing with the anniversary of an assault, but some of the tips in there may help as well (that organization is a great resource for survivors): http://www.pandys.org/articles/copingwi ... aries.html

Looking at those two articles, are there strategies that stand out to you as ones that you'd like to try first?
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