blockage in my heart and want to get this off my chest

When you want support through something scary or rough, and help pulling yourself together and getting through, this is the place.
Forum rules
We ask that users looking for general, ongoing emotional support post in this area of the boards, and that you use this space to both ask for, give and receive that support primarily from each other, rather than from our staff and volunteers. As a staff, we simply are often too overextended with all we need to do in running the organization and its services to do that for extended periods of time, and one of our main aims of our community at the boards has always been to facilitate peers to better be there for each other.

Users often report that they have no in-person peers they can talk to or seek support from: we want this to be a space for online peer support and somewhere everyone can get some practice asking for, getting and giving support so that doing it with people in your lives feels more doable.

Please remember that neither staff, volunteers nor your fellow users can provide or replace mental healthcare when that is something you need. Users struggling with issues like anxiety, depression, abuse or physical health issues are strongly encouraged to seek out qualified, in-person help with those issues in addition to peer or staff support.
anish_bhat
newbie
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Mar 28, 2018 11:26 pm
Age: 31
Awesomeness Quotient: my photography
Primary language: english
Pronouns: my name is fine
Sexual identity: hetrosexual
Location: providence

blockage in my heart and want to get this off my chest

Unread post by anish_bhat »

I am a 25 year old male.. i feel my whole life has been a lie i want to write this post as i feel I have been lying and driving my ego up the wall i feel . Having had intense feelings of sexual repression due to cultural conditioning i isolated myself numerous times. As someone who is a lightworker and extremely empathetic.. I was also an introvert and aloof as I felt i was different from other kids growing up. Can't explain the number of times shame isolation alienation has been a part of me, feelings of unworthiness and sexual shame and rejection due to lack of confidence in being myself has led me to gather various knowledge about myself and the world which is one of the positives i see. I have made some poor choices and I really want to let this blockage in my heart go. I have not physically hurt anyone. I do want to apologise to any woman i may have disrespected .. not accepting myself i feel has led me to never really accepting what was always in front of me or the present moment .. as my ego was too big.. also led to overanalyzing and bad thoughts. My intentions were always good and and I have come to learn a great deal of myself but i really need to let this blockage go as i know the life i want to live lies ahead of me this post is a step in the right direction for me.

Thank you for listening
peace be with us all