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A reminder about this area

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2017 10:48 am
by Heather
Please keep the context in mind when posting in threads in this area of the board. This part of the boards is expressly for those seeking or giving emotional support.

This area isn't a place for intellectual or political rants or venting, or anything else that doesn't bear in mind that people in this area are often here in a delicate emotional state and take that into consideration. It's a place for sensitive care, in a word.

Please bring other ways of posting and other kinds of posts and responses to other areas of the boards. Thank you.

Re: A reminder about this area

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2017 3:22 pm
by cityofthedead
Thanks for telling us, but whatever happened to that discussion you, I and Sam wrote in? Did you delete it?

Re: A reminder about this area

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2017 3:28 pm
by Heather
I took it down.

I felt some of the responses in that thread were more likely to cue trauma (and I say this as someone who has themselves had that kind of violence directly in and around my life) than they were to be felt as supportive to someone feeling scared or who had survived that kind of violence. Effectively, I felt the responses in that thread made the thread I had started not just likely not useful, but counterproductive as an avenue of emotional support, which is what I intended the thread for.

Re: A reminder about this area

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2017 5:26 pm
by cityofthedead
I'm very sorry. Thinking of what I wrote to that forum, I was quite pessimistic. If you were (and it seems you have been) seeking out optimism after tragedies like the Vegas concert shooting, I'm not a good source of it. I'm sorry. I should never have even touched that discussion.

Re: A reminder about this area

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2017 5:36 pm
by Heather
I appreciate that. It wasn't about seeking out optimism, but about emotional support (rather than intellectual debate or political venting). That doesn't have to be optimistic, but there were some elements in the whole thread (not just your own responses) that just felt counter to support to me.

But I do personally always appreciate statements of changed awareness about how any of us responds to delicate situations. All the same, no one actually used that thread for its intended purpose anyway, so it wasn't that huge a loss. Sometimes threads need to go poof here sometimes, It happens. Also: everyone doesn't have to be their A+ self here all of the time, either: that's kind of the point. No need to beat yourself up about this: this is just part of managing the space.

Re: A reminder about this area

Posted: Sun Oct 08, 2017 6:01 pm
by cityofthedead
Thanks again. The support and counter support is what I meant with optimism and pessimism respectively. I can't doubt myself for being unsupportively pessimistic on that thread no matter what you or anyone else may say.

Re: A reminder about this area

Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2017 12:17 pm
by Heather
Just FYI, between this and your post the other day (where I didn't want to respond and derail the thread), I'm concerned about you, cityofthedead. If you'd like to talk some about how you've been feeling and what you've been struggling with, please feel free to start a thread for that, and know I'll be on the lookout for it to offer some support if I can.

Re: A reminder about this area

Posted: Wed Nov 15, 2017 5:19 pm
by cityofthedead
Thank you Heather. I'm totally alright. I'm in a very safe place where, from my knowledge, there has never been a terrorist attack or mass shooting. I've just been owning up and saying that I made a mistake in responding to that thread you would soon delete because I wasn't being supportive. I didn't realize how full of pessimism I was. I will be more careful of my point of view whenever I use these boards again.